Relief and Hope

Relief and Hope ©

By Michael Casey

Well I’ve just come back from hospital and the Doctor I saw was very nice, so that was a relief. Had some bloods and I see another Doctor next month. All in all a good day out, maybe my Kidneys will be sorted soon. So on the bus home I realised I was so happy and relieved, so the girls will get some nice treats today to celebrate this good news. Any excuse and I’m off to the sweet shop, yes I’ve been told before I’m just a big kid.

So what gives you relief? Stop, I write for all not just Ivanoff in Saint Petersburg, I write for everybody. So can you all raise your eyes from the gutter and to the stars, Petroff can you put that magazine away, I’m trying to be entertaining, yes I know not as entertaining as your magazine.

When you run for the last bus and you get there all hot and sweaty and breathing heavily, only for a girl in front of the queue to spin around and mace you, she wondered what the racing footsteps were, and all the heavy breathing. So naturally she did what her little brother always advised, she maced you.

She was so apologetic when she realised, so apologetic that you both missed the bus. She used her bottle of Evian water to wash the mace from your eyes. She decided to take you home with her. You were just a big oaf so you walked hope together. Once you got to her place she explained to her family how she had maced you. They all laughed, Katarina had finally got a boyfriend by macing him at the bus stop.

Her brothers were all bodybuilders and doormen, the two seem to go together. As the oaf was big they had an instant affinity to him, Uri was his name. Uri and Katarina became a couple, and Uri turned out to be a whiz with books, the ones with sums and accounts in. So his relief at catching the bus led to marriage into a family of bodybuilders.

Now I also want to talk about Hope, Hope Springs Eternal so they say. I Hope that as a result of today and next month’s trip to the hospital I’d avoid any more damage to my Kidneys. When you buy a car or a house you Hope that you can afford it, that the Polish builder who’ll give it the once over won’t say it’s not worth buying, that he can knock it into shape within 6 weeks. And best of all the total cost will be within the budget.

Hope is based on the best evidence, and Luck multiplied by the Help of God and 2 policemen, or maybe I’m mixing that up with Prayer. Anyway as my mum used to say Hope, or should I say Pray, Hope and Don’t Worry, that’s what Padre Pio says and he’s worked miracles in the past.

We all hope that the bus comes and that we don’t freeze to death in the cold, this is April in Birmingham after all. Speaking of which I need to put another jumper on, so have a hope while I go and fetch my jumper. Found my jumper with the tooth paste stains down the front, it could be worse, if I didn’t brush my teeth. Talkers always have bad breath, stand anywhere near a Politician and you’ll know I’m telling the truth, even if the Politician isn’t.

So we all have Hopes and Dreams and you never know when your Hope becomes a reality. Today we received a letter addressed to my wife, when she opens it, it could say that the people who own the house we looked at on Saturday have changed their mind and will accept our offer of 96% of the asking price. But then again that could just be an example of an unreal Hope. Though I did stand by the fridge and ask for a wife and perhaps a family, and look what happened to that Hope…