Tinnitus, Snot and Pain
that was me last night/this morning
So I thought it was a good title for a story
They'll be debt collectors, that's the idea, so come back tomorrow
I stepped out of the bath and pulled a muscle in my back , so I'm crawling around
so here' this till I get around to writing more stuff
Crawling
Like a Worm in The Dirt, humbled by a photo copier.
This is one piece from my www.positivethoughts.com essay/blog
postings, I type fast so excuse any mistakes.
Well this is my 100th post, I had hoped I
could think up something nice or even spectacular. This is what I've come up
with. I'm laughing now as I type. Yesterday 5minutes after I started work I
bent down to fill up the copiers. I filled one, then another, then I did a
third. I then screamed, I had straightened up too fast and had ricked/strained
my back on the right hand side. So these past 27hours have been a lesson in
pain and humility. I felt such a fool at work, the girls I work were both
sympathetic and funny. Somebody came by for some coloured paper , I bent down
to look under our shelf and I was racked with pain, one girl told me to crawl
away out of the way so that she could find it instead. I hobbled away, out of
the way. The rest of day I moved about like an 80 year old, rather like my own
dad. I hoped that on my lunch break while I sat for 30mins in the cathedral my
back would be restored. We stand all day in our print as some of you may
remember me mention. Prayer and rest for 30mins no doubt aided my soul but not
my back. I went back to work and hobbled about for a couple of hours. Then I
decided I really had to go home and rest.
Getting
home I got off the bus and had to walk only 300yards, a crippled Charlie
Chaplin kind of walk, though I look more like Oliver Hardy. I was home 2 hours
earlier than normal so the family were surprised.
I told them
I was fired as a joke. Then I sat down on an old chair and then I could hardly
move. Standing up again was an impossibility. Last Friday we had a drama with
my youngest, this Friday,Friday13th it was my turn. My girls all laughed at me,
just as I would laugh at them if the tables were reversed. Night came and knew
I could never climb the stairs to bed, but at least our bathroom was
downstairs. So I tumbled onto our sofa and got ready to spend the night there.
Only we have a glass coffee table in front of it and I was afraid of falling
off onto it. So at 1am I staggered up the stairs like a drunk with locked
joints, then I rolled onto my bed, screaming as I did so. I did sleep, but in
the morning I had to slither out like a snake sliding out of bed on my belly.
Some positions were possible and some were not. My wife laughed till she cried
my youngsters did too, as for me, I laughed and cursed and laughed again. My
wife went to see the pharmacy man for advice and a spray for me. The pharmacist
laughed too, he's an old friend. When she got back I was all sprayed up, the
old spray and the newly bought one drenching me and my room with the stench of
a bad back. I slithered in and out of bed, crawling around as I couldn't stand
up straight. As for getting down stairs that would be an impossiblity. My wife
went shopping, stopping first to steal my debit card, laughing she left me in
my bed of pain. When she returned she gave me yoguart and orange juice. Later I
just had to go downstairs, but I couldn't walk. I slithered off bed like snake,
then made it to my hands and knees, then an inspired idea. I bounced down the
stairs one step at a time, on my butt , one step at a time. Then I crawled
across our living room and pulled myself up onto a chair. I did notice that we
needed a new carpet after 20years our carpet does need replacing. I then
rewarded myself by stealing my wife's pork she'd just made.
Later after
some movements like belly dancer of 120 years old, I managed to straighten up.
I do walk as if I have a full diaper though. I made it too my big chair in
front of my computer. And that’ s how I got to write this 100th post.
The moral
of all this? Well I am a very bad patient. Health is the most important thing
in our lives. I rejoice that my girls have a good sense of humour, even if I am
the butt of it all. Last year when I had food poisoning they had plenty to
laugh about then. And I do laugh at that memory. We are all worms crawling in
the dirt. It is God's love that lifts us up, as does our family life. Sometimes
it is only though pain and adversity that we learn such truths, sometimes we
learn mundane things, but they too have meaning for us, even if its just the
fact that we need a new living room carpet.
THIS IS
FROM NOV 2008 ACCORDING TO MY LIST
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