my daughter Audrey Hepburn
as I speak my small daughter is having her eyes tested
then she hopes to be able to get contact lenses
she really does look like Audrey Hepburn
when she has her shades on
It's my seeds, so to speak, mixed with Shanghai blood
a recipe for perfect hair and looks too
And no there won't be any snaps
My girls have reached the age where Privacy is so important
Her big sister looks like me, face and build
Whereas she is like her mother, smaller and petite
And like any dad with pretty daughters
This leaves me proud but worried
So I'm always like Mr Brown in Paddington
they tell me, talking about safety
If only the had a gay friend who played rugby
Or a gay best friend as big as the Rock
then I'd know they'd be safe
Yes, old fashioned, but I won't be here forever
So I tell them what Whitey should have done
If you are grabbed, don't pull away
But quickly go the same way and trip
the bad guy, then run away
Find Lech, Boris and Gregorgi Check it Out
from a few years ago on my site
That's how any dad feels
Meanwhile my small daughter will be prettier than ever
No glasses hiding her face
Though obviously I call all my beauties, UGLY MUG
Don't want them to think they are as beautiful as me
Where did I put my mirror
As you can see from the photos of me
I always show all my bad looks
You'd all be swooning if I was all dolled up
You'd swoon a lot and bang your head on the PC
in front of you
Duncan on the night shift could never get used to them
So he'd fall asleep while typing and bang his head
and wake up again suddenly
I just remembered that
Anyway stay as pretty as me, and if you have a real
cure for Tinnitus, I'll marry you
Just hope you don't mind scars
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