Is the local library shut, or have they ran out of Fosters?
Thanks for passing by, I'm listening to Crowded House with
lots of symbols thanks to my Tinnitus, so thank you
I have an idea for a new story involving betting, so I'll get around to that soon.
here's an old play from 30 years ago about Betting
Michael G Casey email michaelgcasey@hotmail.com
Betting On Disaster ©
By
Michael Casey
Opening
An office with one wall covered in tv monitors from floor
to ceiling , in
front of that is a large desk/counter . There are phones
and intercoms on
the counter plus an array of buttons . Almost a directors
gallery but not
quite . There are three men seated in front of the
counter , Mark , David,
Terry , besides them is an empty fourth chair .
The first Mark
,who is in his late twenties, in front of him
are some
yeast tablets , there is also a body building magazine ,
though he is no
body builder himself , he is very fashion consious .
Next is David , much older he has half moon glasses on ,
beside him is
a battered thesaurus , he is doing a crossword , he is
wearing clothing of
a high quality though they would be more suited for Basil
Rathbone in an
old Sherlock Holmes mystery . He looks up at the monitors
occasionally he
is only half interested , he has seen it all so many
times before .
Then Terry who is fat and spotty , his fashion sense may
have been buried
with the crock of gold , its lost somewhere over the
rainbow . He has the
remains of several Whimpys in front of him , along with
paper cups of half
drunk coffee . He is reading the Sun , there is a colour
photo of "little
Sammy Fox" , he spills food over the picture and
picks it up , he belches
as he does so.
A very old man with waistcoat and gold chain enters he is
leading a new
recruit .The recruit is all crew cut and collar and tie ,
he is fresh from
university .
George:This is your new boy , he'll be taking my old
position .
David :Thanks George .
Mark :We hope he's
as good as you were , I mean are .
George:Were is the correct word .
Mark looks embarrassed by his lack of tack .
George:I'll still be here a while longer till my
retirement .
Terry :What's he called ?
Frank :I'm Frank .
David :You look a bit young to me , have you just
finished your finals ?
Frank :Yes , I only left Strobeford a month ago .
Mark :Is that one
of the new ones ?
David :Yes it's the newest one in Cambridge , it was
founded with the money
from the
Aids Vacine back in 98 .
Terry :You any relation to the Strobeford's .
Frank :Lord Strobeford was my uncle .
David :That explains it then . His best friend owns this
outfit .
Terry feeds his face and though a mouthful of chips adds
.
Terry :Crossover nepotism .
David :The very thing .
George:I've got other errands to run so I'll leave you to
it .
George slowly leaves , dragging one side of his body ,
he's had a stroke .
Mark :Thanks ,
George .
Frank stands not knowing what to to . So Mark motions him
to sit in the
spare seat .
Mark :Its quite
straightforward really , we watch all the satelite feeds
as they come
in ,then we speak to the tv stations by this equipment
Mark waves his hand expansively .
Mark :We give them
a mix of sport , sensation and human interest .
Terry :Earthquakes and volcanos and plane crashes and
fires in skyscrapers
Mark :People
getting married while they parachute
from 30000 feet .
Terry :People finding long lost relatives after searching
for years .
Mark :I always
like those stories , its my soft spot .
Terry :He has other soft spots too , but I shouldn't mock
the afflicted .
David :Very occasionally we give them news .
Mark pushes some paper over his "body building
" magazine ,before resuming
his "induction speech" .
Mark :All human
life passes before us and we help share it with the world
Terry :I have to admit I like the reunions after many
years of separation,
especially
when the shock and the excitement gives
them a heart
attack .
Terry breaks into laughter , Mark scowls , Frank looks
ill at ease . David
looks up from his crossword .
David :It always strikes me as ironic how something which
people crave so
much is
their undoing for a finish . If they only stayed happily
ignorant
then they'd be alive . Instead they search for years only
to die of a
heart attack when they meet their relatives .
Terry :But think what great tv it makes !"Father
found after fourty years"
then the
added bonus , "Father dies in the arms of a daughter he
never
knew" , and the pictures of a daughter in tears chasing the
ambulance
only to be dragged back by customs - now that's what I
call really
good tv .
Mark :You always
gloat Terry .
Terry :But its true .
David :It is true , though Terry does dwell on the
sensational aspect .
Mark :Well Frank
that's about it ,if you watch us at work you'll soon get
the hang of
it .
Frank :Thanks .
Frank sits down at his place a little unsure . So Terry
leans over to
explain.
Terry :See the screens marked 1 to 20 , well each of
these buttoms will
transmit the
pictures , all you do is push the button at the same
time
pressing the other set of buttons .
Frank :Could you show me ?
A light flashes at Frank's position Terry leans over and
presses before
speaking into the mike at Frank's position .
Terry :CL communications here , what do you want ?
Voice :Can I have some soccar from Brazil ?
Terry looks up and scans the screens , he then presses
the button to match
the picture then presses the "phone" button again
.
Terry:They are coming now .
Terry then turns back to Frank .
Terry :See its easy . Press one lot to answer ,then press
tv button ,then
press answer
button again . The computer does the rest . I forgot
to say
there's an ear piece to so you can pick
out the sound for
the feed
you're viewing .
Frank :Seems straightforward .
David :Occasionally we ring them and tout the services ,
there's a list on
a pad
besides you .
Frank :You're not very busy now are you ?
Terry :Not really , but when the sports results come in
then we get very
busy .
David :People don't want news , they want entertainment .
Frank looks at the monitors , there is a mixture of sport
and disaster on
the screens , then in a corner on its own he sees another
monitor .
Frank :What's that ?
Mark :That's
Northern Ireland , we don't get much call for it nowdays .
David :Most of it is fed straight to West Africa . It's
the only foreign
news they
can afford . Andingi Shatola is the world expert on the
"100
years War in Northern Ireland" .
Frank :You all seem pretty blase about things
David :We've seen it all before that's all , news is the
same as history
- it repeats
itself .
A burp from Terry rings out .
Mark :And so does
Terry .
Terry :You're quite the little wit today aren't you .
David :Please don't start or you'll give the lad the wrong impression .
Frank :But you must get excited every now and then .
Seeing things happen
live .
Terry :It's all the same really , bad news spreads
fastest , always has
and always
will .
Mark :Except Royal
Births , King Harry's triplets a few years ago caused
a sensation
, and we got the news first .
David :I have to admit that the appetite for Royal news
is amazing .
On one of the many screens a volcano is seen errupting .
Mark watches
open mouthed . He puts the volume up so all can hear .
Reporter:Here at the base of Mount Saint Helens we can
see a plume of red
hot
ash and fire bursting skyward trying to touch the sun .
Mark :That's a
bad one , though it does look very pretty like a Turner
painting
in some strange way .
Terry :I wonder
how many are dead or injured or covered in red hot ash
like the
Romans at Pompeii. (HE IS EXCITED)
David
:Thanks for saying Romans its
given me the last answer for my
crossword .
David looks up from the crossword to see the disaster at
Mount St. Helens
David :They
shouldn't call it a mountain anymore , way back in 1980 over
1500 feet was ripped off by a volcano ,
then in 99 another 2000ft
went . Its
just a hill really .
Terry :But it
still spits death and shakes the earth with gigantic hicups
Frank :This is the
first time I can remember it errupting .
David :Shows your
age doesn't it .
Mark :I'll send
this to everybody then .
Mark starts pressing buttons at his position , he
silences the reporter as
well .
Terry :See how Mark did that , Frank , well you do the
same .
A scene of blood an mayhem appears on one screen , Frank flinches , Terry
puts the voice on broadcast .
Reporter:Behind me is the stomach churning sight of yet
another victim of
the
Cambleforth crusher . This person , for police have yet to
establish
the sex , will be the seventh victim of the crazed man
who has
struck so much terror into the North of England .
Terry :Brilliant
I just love a good who dunnit , the real thing is so
much
better than Agatha Christie .
Mark :I bet
you'd love to be there , smelling the blood .
Terry :Of course
I would ,I haven't been stuck behind a desk all my life
David :What never
ceases to amaze me is that its always the North that
produces
these mass murderers ,I know the North is not
a nice
place to
live in , especially after Sellafield exploded and fell
into the
sea , but if you don't like the area you can always come
and live
in the south , providing you are not radioactive and do
have a job
to go to .
Terry :I bet this
killer is a wrestler or an American football player ,
he has to
be , the first thing he does is crush their ribs then
Mark :I think we
can do without the details . Besides its boring now .
Frank :How can
you all be so callous , so detached , its real people not
robots you
are talking about . People's fresh and blood , not so
many lumps
of meat hanging on a butchers hook .
Reporter:Police say they still don't know if more than
one person has been
killed , such
is the carnage .
Terry :I'll send
that to the Far East , they love Agatha
Christie too .
Frank looks on disbelieving as the other three scan the
pictures and press
their transmit buttons . One one monitor a picture of a
little boy appears
Frank watches with interest , we hear that report .
Reporter:Paulo
Caltonat , was out playing this
morning when he did not
return his
parents went and looked for him , all they found was a
shoe .
The child's mother appears holding the shoe .
Reporter:Then the family dog started to bark , they found
the child , but
were
unable to rescue him , he was trapped down an old well . It
was 8am
then , it is now 1pm . For five hours he has been trapped
Terry sees Frank staring at the rescue picture so he
nudges David .
Terry:I bet you a dinner at Diablo's that they get the
boy out by the time
we finish
tonight .
David looks at the picture for a second to judge the
events .
David:The kid will die .
Terry:The last time we had one of these the kid lived .
David:This time he had no breakfast so he'll be hungry
sooner and in that
heat .
David shakes his head , Terry looks uncertain .
Terry:Well a bet's a bet , It'll brighten up our day
anyway .
Mark :Sometimes I think you two are real bastards .
David:News people are bastards.(SAID MATTER OF FACTLY ,
AS IS ALL HE SAYS)
Frank turns to them , he's only just noticed they have
been talking .
Frank:It's bad that isn't it ? I hope the kid gets out .
Mark :Of course he will . (OBVIOUSLY LYING)
Terry:He'll suffer but he'll get out .
David:The kid's had it .
Frank is really shocked by David's matter of fact
attitude . He glares at
him .
Frank:How can you say that , don't you want the kid to
live ? Haven't you
got any feelings ?
David:I'm a media man , I have no feelings , the number
of times I've seen
death and
destruction . (SAID MATTER OF FACTLY)
Terry:Murder and mayhem .
(SAID WITH RELISH)
Mark :Suffering and suicide . (SAID QUIETLY)
David glances at his "echo" before continuing .
David:It no use
having feelings they get in the way , you're not paid to
have feelings
, ok stuck here you can have the odd
sniffle if you
like , but
the lads at the sharp end cann't afford to do that .
Terry:They have deadlines to meet , planes to catch ,
satelites moving out
of position .
Mark :Or even mule trains to catch .
Terry:Do remember old Johnnie Campelton , he once used a
carrier pidgeon
to get some
film out .
David:Didn't he win an award for that .
Terry:Yes the Kodak News Award . One or two tried copying
him after that ,
only the
natives in some famine ate the pidgeons .
David:I remember now , that must have been twenty years
ago .
Frank shakes his head in disgust , he looks back at the
monitor .
Frank:The kid's fallen further down the well . They're
going to get some
pot-holers to
go down after him .
David:It looks like dinner will be on you Terry , and
don't forget dinner
includes a
good bottle or three of wine , the 97 is a good vintage .
Terry:It's not over yet , besides I heard the 96 was a
better vintage .
David:We'll have one of each then .
Terry:Suits me , seeing as you'll be paying , I've heard
they're calling
in a mining
engineer to help .
David:That's not on the feed .
Terry:I've plugged into the radio service .
David presses a few switches then listens intently to his
earpiece .
David:I still say the kid's had it .
Frank:You're a pair of absolute bastards .
Terry:That's one of the more polite things we've been
called .
At this point old George comes in carrying mugs of coffee
, he places one
at each position , a fifth mug he has for himself .
George:Coffee's here . How's the world today lads ?
Mark :There's an
interesting human interest item .
Terry :A kids fallen down a well .
David :The kid's a gonner .
Frank :These bastards are betting on the outcome .
George:They've been doing that as long as I've know them
.
George looks at Frank as they sip the coffee , George
fingers the chain of
his pocketwatch , the chain has trickets hanging from it
, one could be a
cross . Frank is glued to the rescue attempt .
George:How long has the kid been trapped ?
Mark :A few hours
, since breakfast their time .
George:So he'll be hungry .
Terry :And thirsty .
David :And he's slipping further down the well . At least
one good thing
can be said
of it all .
George:What's that ?
David :I'll be having a really good dinner tonight .
David lights up a really foul cigar .
Frank :I need some air .
Frank storms out .
Terry :I don't think the kid has the stomach for the job
.
Mark :Perhaps he's
a non smoker ?
George:I better be off then , I've got my rounds to do .
David :Thank's for the coffee , its the only good news we
can gaurantee .
George walks away giving a backward glance at the rescue
of child on tv .
George:I hope the kid'll be ok . (MURMURS)
David:I think Frank will have to start to grow up or he
won't last long
here .
Mark :Come on give him a chance , it took me a while to
get in the swing
of things .
Terry:I still think you're a bit of a softie .
Mark :I still care if that's what you mean .
David:But at least you control your feelings ,this Frank
will be a nervous
wreck by the
end of the day .
Frank returns , he has washed his face .
Frank:Any other good stories ?
Terry:There's been a spillage of chemical waste in
Sommerville .
Frank:I know Sommerville my father has a place a few
miles from it .
Mark :Is it a nice area .
Frank:Very quite place , though there is a new town
nearby and the old
quarry has
the chemical works , you cann't actually see it .
David:You can now there's a cloud hanging over the entire
area .
They all look at the pictures from Sommerville , a cloud
in the sky and
people closing all doors and windows , some driving away
Frank:My girlfriend lives in that cottage , luckily she's
away .
David:It doesn't look too bad , we have one a month
nowdays .
Terry:The Europeans think GB stands for Grimey Bilge ,
what with all the
crap we
import .
David:It was worth œ80 billion to the economy last year .
Mark :But what about the environment ?
Terry:It doesn't matter it all goes to the North , well
past Oxford anyway
Mark :It's that attitude that killed all the seals off
back in 88 .
David:I heard the World Wildlife people say there were
over a 1000 pair
now , so
that's not too bad .
Terry:What's wrong with a few species dying off anyway
Frank:You all sound like the pundits down the
pub , nothing really
matters so long as the price of a pint
stays reasonable .
Terry:You forgot
to mention so long as the head's not
bigger than the
pint !
David:I cann't abide pubs that do that , its a cardinal
sin .
Mark :I hate unwashed glasses myself , I mean you never
know what you may
catch .
Frank:You really are the most selfish lot of bastards
I've ever met .
David:Oh do grow up , cann't you tell when we are joking
.
Terry:I wasn't joking .
Mark :I was only half joking , well- unwashed glasses ARE unhealthy .
David:Can we get back to work , looks like a major crash
on Brazilian
railways .
They all stare
at the scene , bodies everywhere and a mangled mass of
trains and track .The reporter speaks , David puts it on
the tannoy so all
can hear.
Reporter:Here in Santa Jorge we witness a scene of utter
carnage , a train
appears to
have hit a petrol tanker that got stuck on the level
crossing ;
the train , a local train was full , it was market day
David:That Jenkins is a real good actor , he looks as if
he IS really
concerned for
the people .
Terry:Isn't he the grandson of the late great Peter
Jenkins .
David:The very same grandson .
Terry:The top journalism prize is the Jenkins , didn't
John Jenkins get
it too ?
David:Yes , that's why this David Jenkins is trying so
hard to live up
to his
father's and grandfather's reputation .
Terry:Like you say he is a good actor .
Mark :Oh I know him , he did actually try to be an actor
before he went
into this
game .
David:Only his acting has improved .
Reporter:The scene is one of utter devastion with human remains littering
the area ,
the smell of death hangs over like a dark cloud , this
dark day
will never be forgot .
Mark :I thought he'd break into Shakespeare then .
Frank:I don't believe you , of course he's touched , I am
and I'm miles
away , a
whole continent away .
Terry:Really?
(GENUINELY SHOCKED)
David:You've a lot to learn then . We've all seen it all
before , hundreds
of times , you get used to it , it becomes
routine .
Terry:Boring even .
Mark :Years ago people were shocked when a Pope was shot
, even us ,but
times have
changed so much .
Frank:I don't think I want to become like you .
David:Then you're in the wrong job .
Old George comes in and hands a message to David .
George:The boss wants to know how Frank is doing .
David:What's he want me to do , write him a bloody school
report .
Terry:Just say "He shows promise for the future ,
once he gets used to the
working
environment he will be a welcome addition to the team " .
Mark :You must have a degree in bullshit .
David:Just say he's settling in nicely .
George:Ok .
George looks up at the pictures of the train disaster ,
he nervously plays
with the chain to his pocket watch .
George:That's a bad one . There must be people trapped
inside too .
David:There always are in these cases .
Terry:Better off if they died judging by the look of some
of them .
Frank:These
ghouls think the reporter on the
scene is pretending to be
moved , they
say he's acting so he can get the "Jenkins" award .
George:It used to be called the "Michael Burke"
award when I was a lad .
David:Who's Michael Burke
, even I cann't place that name .
George:You're making me feel ancient now . As for young
Jenkins though , I
hate to have
to say this but he IS acting . Look at his eyes , and
haven't you
seen him glance at his watch all the time .
David:I was about
to tell him that , Jenkins is hurrying
so he can meet
the deadline
for the next satelite feed .
Frank looks more closly and he has to agree with them .
George pats Frank
on the shoulder then leaves ,as George leaves he glances
at the scenes of
destruction on the monitors .
Frank:You're right then , but somebody must care , they
MUST .
Mark :Old George does ,
but it got him nowhere it just left him
drained
and worn out
.
Terry:You have to
restrain your feelings or else you are left
dried out
like a prune
, you must be professional .
At that moment one screen lights up with the "Miss
Striptease Results"
Terry:Bloody Hell look at the tits on her .
David:The rest isn't too bad either . (SAID MATTER OF FACTLY AS USUAL)
Mark :So much for the restraint .
Terry:Wait till the "Body Builders" come on
then we'll see about restraint
Frank:I thought we
were a news channel ?
David:This is part of the results service . The Miss Striptease is 50
years old ,
it started when people got fed up of the Miss Beauty .
Mark :I saw a video about that at the library , it was
very quaint .
Terry:All" I want to meet people , look after
animals and old people and
above all be
happy" .
David:They didn't mention the fact" favours"
were offered .
Terry:And gratefully received !
Terry laughs like a drain , David chuckles softly . Mark
looks embarrassed
They all resume their work for a while . Until there is a
space report .
David puts it on the tannoy .
Reporter:Today
will be the 30th landing on Mars ,
all is expected to go
well
though everybody will be holding their breaths
, for as you
may
remember the last landing ended in disaster when the crew of
ten all
died when a retro rocket misfired and so caused a crash .
The crew
on the Mars settlement are also
hoping for a safe
landing as due to the previous
disaster their return home has
been
delayed by two years .
David:I'd forgotten all about that , its just like
clockwork .
They all press their controls to send the pictures
everywhere .
Terry:Oh I remember the crash the last time , it was
really good , I've
got it on
tape at home in fact . I watch it
whenever I have a
a hangover ,
I get so excited I forget my headache .
Mark :I bet you've got tapes of "Miss
Striptease" too .
Terry:Of course , the space striptease ones are the best though .
Terry laughs like a drain .
David:It's still
seems odd that with all the progress in space
we still
don't have
many woman up there .
Frank:I like all the harmony there is in space .
The other three stare at him .
Frank:You know Russia , America , Japan and Australia all
co-operating .
David:Am I hearing things ?
Terry:No he really did say it .
Mark :I know I was a triffle naive when I started but not
that much .
Frank:I don't care what you cynics say , I think it's
nice , it shows the
true human
spirit .
Terry and David exchange looks .
Terry:Go on David you tell him .
David clears his throat before he speaks .
David:Many
many years ago there was an
accident at a Nuclear reactor ,
this was before fision and fast breeders were commonplace
. The
place was
called "Three Mile Island" in America , then a few years
later a real disaster occured at a placed called
"Chernobil" in
Russia . I
call it a disaster , nothing compared to when Sellafield
fell into the
sea or when Minsk was wiped off the face of the earth.
or when Los
Angeles just dissappeared .
Terry:The Americans didn't mind about L.A. as they call
it because as they
said at the
time "We've Lost Aids" . As Aids was rampant in the city
then , the
vaccine not being yet discovered .
David:To
continue , these
civil nuculear accidents showed
the
Superpowers,
as they were then called , what the world would look
like if they
ever used their arsenals . So they decided to reduce to
10% of what they both once had . So they then had a surplus of
rocket fuel ,
so it was decided to head for Mars . It was of mutual
benefit and
prestidge . The Russians spent the money
saved not on
guns but on
American grain so it worked out well for everybody .
Terry:The Japs always wanted to go into space but wanted
a partner , so
when one
night a drunken Australian P.M. said
Australia would go
to the Moon
and then beyond , while at a reception at the Japonese
Embassy , the
Japs showed it on tv .
David:The P.M. couldn't back down , so Australia and
Japan joined forces .
Frank my boy
, its got bugger all to do with harmony , it just plain
bloody sense
, its cheaper than the arms race and
once this planet
is finished ,
which will be in 200 years at the rate we're going the
Yanks and the Russians want somewhere else to
go . As for the Japs
its an
adventure , and the Australians will do anything for a laugh.
Terry:It was the Australians who started the space
striptease before the
tv companies
bought some timeshare on a supplies vessel .
Frank:Your joking .
Terry:Staight up . An Aussie was in space , when they
beat the West Indies
at cricket so
he got pissed on Australian Champagne , as did his
female crew .
It ended up in the first space striptease , and nine
months later
two of the Japs gave birth . The Aussie and his two
wifes and
children went to live on the statelite relay station on
the dark side
of the moon .
Mark :I bet you've got tapes of that space first too .
(DISGUSTED)
Terry:Of
course , its
antique footage worth a bit no
doubt , but I
wouldn't sell
.
Mark :A true collector .
(SARCASTICALLY)
On one screen an
update of the trapped infant appears , Frank puts it on
the tannoy.
Reportor:Sadly it
looks as if the trapped infant has given up
his fight
for life ,
he's made no sound for two hours now . The rescue will
continue
but it looks as if there will be no rejoicing when it is
over.
On the monitor
the picture move from the reporter back
to the mother
clutching her
child's shoe .Frank lowers the volume ,
he sheds a silent
tear for the dead infant .
David:Well Terry it looks like dinner is on you .
Terry:You win some , you lose some .
Frank looks at them in disbelief , then he storms out .
Terry:What's the matter with him .
David:He won't last the week .
Mark :I better see if he's ok .
Mark gets up and heads for the door . Terry shouts after
him .
Terry:He's got a girl friend already , you won't get a
look in .
David:It never ceases to amaze me how naive the youth of
today are .
Terry:They've got no backbone at all .
On one screen an update of the chemical spillage at
Sommerville .
David:It looks like the chemicals were much more toxic
than first expected
Terry:They always lie when something happens .
David:They started flying the stuff in when locals
blockaded the roads .
Terry:It's progress no doubt .
Frank and Mark return , Frank has washed his face .
Mark :Did we miss anything ?
Terry:Not really , the chemical spillage is worst than
they admitted .
David:But that's par for the course , but who care's
anyway -its up North.
Mark :I suppose you are right .
Frank shakes his head in disgust .
Terry:Do you want to go double or quits ?
David:You mean for two dinners ?
Terry:Why not its been a boring day so far .
David:What's the bet ?
Terry scans the screens .
Terry:I say they'll be at least ten dead at Sommerville .
David:Your pushing your luck .
Terry:The weather report says its windy so they'll be a
wider spread .
David:Does this bet include deaths caused by panic as
well or just direct
poisoning .
Terry:Well I thought you'd give me a chance and include
the indirects too
David:I'm a fool to myself but you're on ,it has been a
slow day after all.
Mark :Cann't you to give it a rest , you can see the boy
is upset .
David:Dear me , you're not going soft on us are you ,
after all this time
Mark :Let's just say I have some tact .
Terry:Bollocks .
David:Don't say that word you'll excite him . (DRYLY)
Terry:You're right there .
Mark turns his
back on them in disgust
David:So the bet is on . I'll put it on all the screens ,
there should be
two or three
crews up there .
The screens now all show Sommerville with a poison cloud
over it .
Frank looks at the pictures with a heavy heart .
Terry:Look there's an ambulance .
David puts the volume on tannoy for that picture .
Reporter:Here at
"The Haywaine" there has been an unfortunate death
.An
aged
couple hearing of the alert tried to leave their cottage ,
sadly the
man , a Mr John Demkin , while
helping his wife
downstairs tripped and broke his neck , his
wife also fell
breaking her pelvis . She was still alive when discover by a
policeman
who had come to help evacuate them . She died of shock
shortly
after hearing that her husband of sixty years was dead .
Terry:Two down eight to go .
David:Sixty years married , you only get thirty years for
mass murder .
Mark :I think its sweet being married for sixty years .
Frank:I know them . (HE SAYS QUIETLY)
Terry:Not any more .
Frank is in shock now , he hasn't got the strength to
answer back
David:It looks like the usual story , pretend there is no
emergency , then
admit there
is a slight problem .
Terry:Then say the problem is just a little worse than
anticipated , but
still no
cause for alarm .
David:Then before the ink has dried on the press release
its bingo .
Terry:Total disaster .
David:And where
did we leave the emergency plans , does the
kit still
work ?
Terry:There is a silver lining - it makes great tv .
David:Always . (HE'S GETTING BORED NOW)
Mark :I just heard on a radio feed the Cambleforth
Crusher has been caught
Terry:Was I right , was he a wrester ?
Mark :No but , he
was in an American football team . Only
he got kicked
out when the
trainer found him with his wife , the woman set him up
just to annoy
her husband .
Terry:Don't tell me all his victims look like the trainer
and his wife .
Mark :Yes . You always spoil the fun , you should have
let me spin it out.
Terry:I would normally , as you are so good at spinning
things out , but I
am only
interested in this poison cloud for the moment .
Mark :You really like the way I tell things . (HE IS
FLATTERED)
Terry:Of course . (OFF HANDEDLY , HE IS CONCENTRATING ON
THE SCREENS)
David:You do brighten the day for us , everything is oh
so predictable .
Mark is really flattered , he is beaming with pride . We look at them in
turn . Mark his ego boasted , David bored , Terry on edge
over the bet ,
Frank in the depths of sorrow . Old George comes in with
coffee and a pile
of food for Terry .
George:How's things ?
David:Terry is afraid he'll have to stand me two dinners
.
George passes out the coffee and leaves the tray by Terry
. Frank awakes
slightly from his torpor , he picks up his coffee and
sips it .
George:You betting on the poisoning ?
Terry:Only
another eight deaths then its
David who will be buying
the
dinner . An
old couple have died already .
Mark:They are playing double or quits .
George:It looks bad . What's the matter with the boy .
Mark:All this is too much for him , he knew the people
who died too .
George:Oh .
George goes over
to Frank , he gives him a reasuring pat
on the back ,
then before turning to leave he looks from Mark to David
and Terry then
back to Frank ,
then to the screens , reporters
jostling to film the
bodies of the old people being put in the ambulance .
George looks at his
pocket watch then leaves the room , still clutching the
watch .
David:What's this .
On the screens a police car has hit another car . Both
are mangled .
Terry:They look dead , the bodies haven't been moved yet
.
David:That's another three dead .
Terry:No another four , look there's a toddler in the
back .
The reporter on the screen speaks .
Reporter:We came across this scene while on our way to a local hospital.
The camera moves around the scene , we see all the dead clearly
.
Reporter:There is
nothing we can do for them , so we'll
carry on to the
hospital .
We see Terry smiling now .
Terry:That's
six then , it looks like dinner will be on you . As
I'm
feeling generous instead of two dinners for me on two
nights I'll
let Mark come
with us
Mark:That's good of you but I may be doing something else
tonight .
David:Not washing your hair ? (QUIETLY)
Mark:Pardon ?
David:You're not wasting a change to eat at my expense ?
Mark:Oh all right then I'll come .
Mark picks up the
phone and a hurried conversation
ensues , before
slightly flustered he puts it down .
Mark:It's all settled I'll be going out with you two .
Mark tidies the phone and edges it away . David and Terry
exchange smiles.
Terry:That's so long as another four die .
Mark:I almost forgot that .
David:It looks like the reporting teams are all heading
for the hospital.
Terry:Deathbed gasps and hands clutched in love as one
"half" dies .
Mark:Those things still bring a tear to my eye .
On the screens we see three victims swathed in bandages
and tubes .
Reporter:These three men were at the chemical company
when calamity came .
David:Sometimes I wish they'd cut the alliteration , it
sounds as it he is
describing an
old John Wayne film - "Calamity Came" .
Terry:That's quite good that "Calamity Came"
Mark:Look , I think those three are going to die .
The three watch as the screens show the men in their
final death throes .
The reporter is moving forward looking for an exclusive
interview when the
worker literally dies on him . The reporter is seen
mouthing "Oh shit" in
his disappointment . So the reporter does not try to
interview the other
two . He switches to an oration .
Reporter:As we stand here behind me these brave men fight
their last brave
fight .
The struggle for life itself , but it is all in vein , we
can hear
them gasping for breath , choking for
air ,
clutching
the hands
of the nurses in one last desperate act of gratitude .
We look back at David and the others again .
David:Well that is nine , one more and the dinner is on
me .
Terry:That reporter should go into politics he is so
corny .
Mark:It's true what you say but I still find it touching
.
They notice Frank still clutching his coffee , he is at
breaking point ,he
is glaring at the screens .
David:You can leave if you want to Frank.
No reply from Frank .
David:You can leave now if you like Frank .
Terry:Yes go , you just aren't suited for this .
Mark:It's not everybody's cup of tea .
Frank:Perhaps I should .
George comes in at that moment .
George:The old man wants to know if you lot are on
strike ?
David:We'll be back to normal soon .
Terry:As soon as I win my bet .
There is a rush of activity on the screens , a body is rushed in on a
stretcher .
Terry:Looks like number ten and dinner is served .
Reporter:This
young girl crashed her car when
she swerved to avoid
an
ambulance
. It does not look good .
The nurses on screen cut away the clothes of the girl and
a heart shock
machine is wheeled forward . We hear Terry say
"God what a body , what a
waste" . We see the face now .
Frank:Jane ! Jane ! Jane ! (SCREAMING)
David:What's the matter with him ?
Mark:It cann't be his girlfriend he said she wasn't there
.
One the screen we see the doctor applying the shock
, the
girl's body
flinches . We see Frank again .
Frank:Jane ! Jane ! Jane !
Terry:I think it
is his girlfriend . What a waste , what a body
. At
least I get dinner .
Frank jumps up and
begins to throttle Terry , on the
screens behind
another shock is given to the girl . The body of the girl
jumps , then the
doctor listens for a pulse . Frank stops to look . As he
loosens his grip
on Terry he sees the doctor shake his head . The girl
must be dead .
Frank:No , No , No Oh God No .
Frank moves
forward and touches the face of Jane on the screen .
As he
strokes her hair on the screen a sheet is slowly brought
over her face .
Frank screams "You Bastards" and punches one of
the monitors.
There is a loud bang and flash , everthing disappears .
We are now outside and two maintainance men are forcing
the door open .
1st Man:The breakers tripped out , all the teams are
screaming blue murder
all the
satelite feeds have gone dead .
They open the door to the room David and Co were in .
Only it is covered
in cobwebs , as the maintainance men enter a dove flies
out .
On the desk are three Toby jugs each has a face , David ,
Terry and Mark
to one side is a cracked statue of an angel . The men
move to a breaker
switch , before
they get to it the lights come on .
They hear a loud
chuckling . Outside in the corridor is George , it is him
who is chuckling
He is looking at his pocket watch . We see it clearly
there is a cross on
the chain , and a Star of David and a little Budda and a little sword .
The face of the pocket watch has Father Time on it . The
maintainance men
look after George they are about to question him when he
disappears as he
walks down the corridor . We hear news reports from offices
down the
corridors . All is good news .
The End
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