And This makes my Life Perfect ©
By
Michael Casey
So, all I have to do is follow the plan, and I’ll touch my toes again.
If I buy this book and read it religiously I’ll be truly free.
There is of course the Tshirt too, that’s free if I subscribe to the Podcast
Then there are seminars, and meetings, and we have a special greeting
For only $500 we’ll be so hip and groovy, and a full 1% donation to Charity
So now I feel I’m in with the In crowd, and my Life will be so meaningful
I’ll have a glow, because I’m so fit
But if you believe any of this then frankly
you are worshipping a bucket of S**T
Come on Wake up, don’t Woke Up
You have fallen for the 3 card trick
Why spend all your hard earned cash on any of this
All that cash, and all it does is give you a rash
Rashly running to the New Life, having no time for Reality
Sorry I’ll miss you, I have to go to this seminar there
And I’m struggling to find the air fare, buddy can you spare a million dimes
I’ll pay you back I promise, once I finish this course my life will be richer
And then, and then I’ll pay you back, but lend me more for the Online bit
And yes folks it’s all a crock of S**T
Think for yourself, talk to Pete over the fence, or Pat in the steet
Talk with Tom, Dick or Harry and Gay Larry, and Liz the Lesbian too
Talk to Don the toilet cleaner at the Gym
Ask hairy Mary down the store
Ask and ask again
Speak to the Virgin, not Mary, though she is a good listener too
But Veronica the Virgin, the mother of ten, who drives a school bus
She bought if cheap to drive her brood about
Ask Den too, who always did the dirty with Veronica the Virgin
He was a lonely child and swore he’d have a baseball team of kids
And when he met Veronica a single child herself, she agreed
So 1st base, 2nd base, 3rd base, 4th base and repeated home runs later
Veronica and Den were no longer but a dozen, and they say its cheaper
That way, by the dozen
But the point is why pay for boring vacuous rubbish
When you can get free opinions from family and friends
And save your money for Walmart bargains instead
As if these Life Coaches have ever had a real job
As if they really care about you, just their fake tans and teeth
And stock options as they fleece you and me, and laugh all the way
To their Cayman island bank
You have your priest or rabbi or wise Wanda the street walker
Wanda has seen life from many positions, and her advice
Normally from a park bench as she sobers up
Is real advice hard won, very hard won, but it is real
Not fake or imaginary, even if it is don’t be like me, do the opposite
Do you want to join the Selfie crew, or really selfish
I’m all right Jack as I’m conning you, out of your hard earnt money
Do you really want to be like a perma-tanned homes abroad sales agent
You have choices in life, and who really cares about you
Your Priest, your family and your community
So, get some reality and don’t waste your cash on programmes
Switch them off with your remote, and vote with your feet
And if things are really bad, buy a ticket to ride, and shake the dust off
And try your luck someplace else
You don’t need any sales pitch, just hitch your wagon
And follow the stars, in the sky, nowhere else
And take yourself to the Promised Land, that you decide for yourself
In the end the only person you can trust is yourself
So, listen to the toilet cleaner, listen to everybody
But you decide what’s best for you
So, spend spare money on a better diet and walking shoes
And if you can spare a dime, put it in the Charity box
Not in some Cayman island account
And this is free advice, which may not claim to change your life
But if it does, don’t thank me, thank the toilet cleaner
****. so my famine is over here’s a new piece, and hello to Shaffi who the office girl thought was a Lazy Scruffy Indian when in fact he taught Consultants ho to use lasers in surgery
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