Sunday 10 June 2018

High Hopes, Low Desires



High Hopes, Low Desires ©
By
Michael Casey

Well the tryst is on in Singapore, Trump left his wife all alone in the White House while he meets little Rocket Man,I never knew he was an Elton John fan, now he’ll be holding his candle in the wind. Rocket Man has stolen a pair of Elton’s specs, hopefully now he can see clearly, for miles and miles. He is so worried about assassination he had a dummy plane take off first then he hitched a ticket to ride on an Air China plane pretending to go to Beijing before bending over backwards to Singapore. It also proved China is doing its bit in getting Kim to the altar on time. In fact they have done everything, but will allow Trump’s ego to get all the credit.

Trump’s plane is great he can tweet while airborne and denigrate the Canadians too, that is multitasking. He really is a Red Bull in a china shop, I know he doesn’t touch alcohol, but maybe Red Bull is allowed, and too much of it. Though NO American President will ever allow anybody else to treaten it with nukes, and that my friends is why nuclear fallout could be blowing in the wind. And maybe why Elton  John, sorry I mean Kim is blowing too, and its not just the free beans from Heinz, but fear of God, not that believes in anything except Kim.

So when Trump and Kim meet it will be a case of you show me yours and I’ll show you mine. Kim’s big envelope had a drawing of a Trump golf course and hotel with a MacDonalds too. That’s his first position. Trump will just show him his hands and then like a magician show a satellite picture of Kim’s nukes on their trailers. Kim has to tick the boxes to admit the picture is correct and in return the Donald will sign the back of his scorecard, which will mean Kim gets his golf course.

Simple negotiation really, John Bolton will appear as a waiter with decent Chinese beer for Kim and Coca Cola for the Donald. As Kim gets more and more drunk, Pompeo will note down all the military dispositions, he was in the CIA before so he can sift BS from truth. Donald will look at his watch and suggest they play around, a round of golf that is. So with 100s of bodyguards in attendance Kim and Trump will play golf. Kim is great in bunkers, he’s had years of practice hiding things and making them reappear. The Donald will give him a free Pres45 baseball hat. Kim can give nothing in return, though he will offer to send 1000 Army girls to parade down Pennsylvania Avenue for Trump. Trump smiles more than when he had Kim’s namesake Kim in his office the other week.

A special relationship is forming between Kim and the Donald, Theresa May is no doubt spitting at her tv, and cursing as old a vicar’s daughter can. I should have never held his hand, I should have twisted it up his back and broken it, she spits at the tv, before her husband consoles her.

In the afternoon what are they going to do? Well Kim suggests a bit of surfing, trying to body shame the Donald. But Trump is a secret nudist, you ask the White House staff, that’s why Sarah Huckerby Sanders has that expression on her face, too much exposure to the Donald as he lies naked on his sun bed, dictating. So Trump folds his clothes and leaves them on a rock, with is code for a secret service guy. Kim just strips and together hand in hand they walk into the sea. Obviously no official photos of the event, apart from a Russian Nuclear submarine live streaming video to Putin, to add to his Trump collection. His hands, his hands is all Putin can say. Obviously this is hacked by both the Americans and China.

Kim and the Donald emerge from the sea like from in Here to Eternity or some James Bond film. Lovers, ego lovers united hand in hand naked on a Singapore beach. Kim was Trump’s little brother, Trump gives him piggy back rides, and holds his hands and swings him, but deliberately lets him fall into the sea. They both laugh, but Kim stumbles and bangs his head on a rock.

Disaster has stuck, has Trump killed Kim, there would be no more laughter on the beach, not even Barry White could sing it away. Trump rushes and drags Kim out, he gives him CPR, and mouth to mouth. The Russian Nuclear submarine records everything, Putin is so jealous, Kim kissed Trump first. If Kim dies it could be nuclear war. In China they are mass producing the Singapore video already, either way it a win for China.

Kim awakens, his big brother before him, Trump is relieved his little brother is still alive and kicking. On that beach through adversity, naked together they had regained their innocence. So using a shell Kim draws the location of all his military hardware in the sand. There are no more bunkers for Trump, he is on the fairway. A still naked Kim gives Trump all he has by way of missiles, and in return Trump gives Kim his balls. North Korea will have Christmas, they will have a Trump hotel and golf course. Trump is so happy still naked he motions over his Body Man, and taking his phone rings Xi and says THANKS, I COULD NOT HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT YOU.

Then hand in hand Trump and Kim walk still naked up to the beach house, they are brothers, and brothers have no secrets, no weapons to fight each other. A brother will save your life, and that’s exactly what Trump had done. It was time for Green Tea and a MacDonalds.

And how did this all come to pass, well a bit of Angel Dust was used, real Holy Angel Dust. Saint Michael himself was on that beach and in the water banging a head on a rock so that the man within could reveal himself and do the right thing, Saint Michael had turned Trump into the man he should always have been. 






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