Friday, 16 November 2018

A Walk to the Woods



A Walk to the Woods©
By
Michael Casey

Now we’ve been here a month now but I hadn’t taken a look at the Woods so today I did. I was pleased to see that we are only 5 minutes away and I did not collapse on the way. Some of the hills are very very steep, ok I’m old and past it, well not past it, remember the Abba song, anyway I have to be careful on hills they are very steep near us.

Then a joy to behold I was in the woods, I’d not been for a few years, when I did the school run I was there as the school is near there, and now I was back. It was in late 2014 that I was last there prior to what turned out was my quadruple heart bypass. So 4 years it must be. I did feel a wave of nostalgia, and then fear as I thought a rottweiler wa coming for me, all slobbering with spit as thick as my fingers hanging from its mouth.

It turned out that it was Rolo, a browny coloured Labrador with a ball in his mouth, spit dangling as he ran about. I said hello to the man as my fear subsided. Rolo said hello to me, chocolate coloured as he was, hence his name. Or did the owner love him so much he’d give away his last rolo for him, as the advert goes.

I sat on the bench and noticed that it was called The Hemingway Bench, so obviously it was there for my fat behind, I am a writer after all. It said take the long view. I asked Rolo’s owner how much a Ladrador cost, as we dream of such a dog, it was much higher than anticipated. Then away Rolo and owner went, as this fat writer’s behind caught a cold, the new bench was a black painted metal. The Council have been improving the woods, metal bench replacing the wooden one.

It started to drizzle so I headed down the less step hill to the shops, I could also make out the lights of the Post Office tower in the distance. Maybe 50 years ago when it was new we actually started to climb inside it, a door must have been left open, it was as cramped as a bell tower I seem to remember.We met a man who asked us what we were doing, and it was difficult to turn around on the stairs.I also checked out the bus stop for future reference and discovered that one only ran once an hour.

I managed to get to my local Coop and said hello to my Muslim friend on security, I’ve done security so I know what a thankless job it can be. I had to judge how heavy the stuff would be to take back home up the hill, no I’m not old and decrepit, but now post op with my arthritis too now these things have to be thought about, I even have to balance the weight of shopping over two bags,one in each hand. Don’t laugh, this may be your future too, like I said before I inherited my diseases one from my mum and one from my dad, we are a close family after all. Though I should add I am still very fast, so if you try and steal my shopping I will hit you, nobody steals my Rolos.

Luckily for me the bis came just as I sauntered to the bus stop, so that was perfect, my circle would be complete. A Rastaman was trying to work out where the bus was going as all the numbers have been changed recently, from a 3 digit number to a 2 digit number, with letters thrown in at the end. I think the bus company were running short on numbers hence the change. In England bus routes mention Pubs, so its from the Victoria to the William via the Charles or the Duke of Edinburgh It really confuses strangers especially when the name of the pub changes or when pub is demolished but the bus stop name remains the same.

A nice black lady explained to the Rastaman that 67 was really 234 and 69 was really 325 or some other number, me I hadn’t a clue, I’d only rediscovered this route now that my heart meant I’d struggle to walk it, in fact I’d probably collapse. I observed that it all sounded like Maths to me, equations. Was the nice black lady really a teaching assistant in the local school, we have 5 near where I live.

I then noticed another lady, she had pillows, so I asked where she got them from. A bargain at Debenhams she declared. I told the nice black lady I might mug the other lady for her pillows. I had used a stuffed toy for 2 weeks, the owl you see in the pictures. So I got off the bus and followed the pillow lady, she walked too fast for me, so even if I wanted to steal her pillows I would not get them.

So when I got home I looked at the website instead. I checked my watch 45mins to finish my circle, which is about the time it took to write this. So I’ll end by singing All My Life’s a Circle. 





























No comments:

Portuguese Translations

Humour Writing by the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham England read in 167 countries so far https://www.amazon.co.uk/Micha...