the spirit is willing the flesh is weak
so here's an old story
A
Brief History of Pain ©
By
Michael
Casey
Well
it is 2.30am on 20th
Feb 2018, and after a good family day tonight I am all alone with
just Pain for company. I’ve had to get up as I’m in so much pain
and lying down just hurts. My left shoulder feels like I’ve been
stabbed, after 5 or six such stabbings and screaming out in pain at
the top of my voice I’ve decided to get out of bed.
I
had been congratulating myself because its several weeks since I last
had to get up in the middle of the night due to pain. I was thinking
about dialing 999 but they’ll just say take pain killers. The pain
is so severe some times you’d welcome the sight of the undertaker,
yes it’s not Micky Mouse pain.
During
the day nobody sees your pain, you just stroll like John Travolta to
the shops and have a joke with the workers, ok bore them while they
smile through gritted teeth at your inane humour. They don’t see
you run out of energy like the bunny rabbit with the rubbish
batteries in as in the adverts.
They
don’t hear you scream for the Movelat, it works in 5 minutes you
know. So this is my life. Not pain all the time, but too much of the
time. Pain appears like a mugger at a time and place and location on
my body of its choosing. Some days left hip, some days right hip,
some days my back. Some days I have a limp others I do not. On good
days I’m a very fast walker, as I used to be all my life till 2013.
It
is all so random. That’s why it is so annoying, I never know when
I’ll be screaming in pain, or just mildly discomforted. Its a merry
go round of pain, up and down and around and around, with just a bit
of Tinnitus as occasional accompaniment. Yes I do have many good days
but I have too many days overshadowed by pain. Not forgetting the
occasional stabbing pain to the heart which is not a heart attack,
and when I did call 999 that time and spent a night in hospital, they
did not really know the cause.
So
as I wait for sleep to overpower me so I can chance lying down,
please understand what it is like for me. But more importantly think
about people in far more pain, like your old granddad, and try and
have some patience and love for them when they are having bad days.
This
has been a brief history of pain, I hope it explains choose to act
the fool, especially when I write.
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