TINNITUS KILLING ME again (c)
by
Michael Casey SOB, son of a blacksmith
I kind of missed a day, the Tinnitus was a Tsunami of noise
and actual physical pain
all you can do is hide in bed
yes a lover would be great to keep you warm
and to hold onto
but the Tinnitus is like being on the Titanic
No steamy love scenes, in a car with misted up windows
just the terror of being engulfed
and not by a lover
just by noise
It is the worst thing in my life ever
and I've had far too. many bad things
and I still get arthritis pain daily
and hernia pain too
as well as the back end of this whooping cough
where I nearly choke to death
Yes, welcome to my death
and it's your soul that suffers
so The Boxer does spring to mind
though I always sleep in the nude since 1986
when I got my own house
so no boxer shorts on my
just overwhelming pain
and not knowing from day to day
or even from hour to hour how bad it will be
If I pop to the shops, the happy fool
you are seeing the best bit of me
I climb back into the lions den once back at home
yes this is my life these past few years
I don't know where my resilience comes from
so allow me to dream
of 4 more sons and oriental young wife
as I choke to death and cough my guts up
all so very appealing
as I slap on the Neem
because regular pain killers
destroy my kidneys even more
on. top of my quadruple heart bypass
so flights of imagination
and writing itself
aids my sanity
even when I cannot write full stories
but writes pieces like this
because Tinnitus is in my head and in my bed
I'd rather have a young PhD instead
but you curse and judge me now
Is my imagination yours to control too
you try my life for just one day
try walking in my size ten shoes
Get somebody to randomly kick and punch you
and choke you, and scream 24/7 and invade your bed
with noise
How long do you think you would last
I won't add the subtext too
you haven't got a clue
No wonder Taylor Swift a fellow Tortured Poet
is swearing, and saying(*())). YOU
Are your eyes wide shut, or are they open
Your thoughts are at least 4 times faster than your words
Writing is the slowest
Then Speaking, Then Thinking
and speed it up with Tinnitus is your head
so what can you imagine
years of. Tinnitus like that
and mine is affected by Wind, Cold, even what I eat
and even thoughts can make it worse
I'll put a Title to all this so you can sample it in a book later
ordinarily I wouldn't bother
but I realise this might be good stuff for you all to study
I'll finish now but I'll tell you this
I was up at 7am for toast and tea and heart meds
then went back to bed and lost a day
Tinnitus roaring in my head
It's nice tonight to see even Mongolia
is reading me
Maybe it was the girl from Kdrama
where a Korean was lost in Mongolia
and came back home to find her family
maybe I need a girl like that in my life
But Life is Reality not Kdrama, unfortunately
But. It's always good to dream
I'm still. 20 in my head after all
though my illnesses are killing my body and soul
so my faith saves me
so judge yourselves first
and look in that mirror
and change
at least its not me or my Tinnitus in your bed or head
Food for Thought, and thank you all my readers all over the world
be a good Samaritan, you may be in the gutter like me
but you still have your dreams in your head, if not in your bed
Kang Nam Soon has superhuman strength. She went missing as a kid in Mongolia. Now as an adult, she comes to Gangnam, Seoul, South Korea to find her parents. She finally meets her mother Hwang Geum Joo.
https://decider.com/2023/10/09/strong-girl-nam-soon-netflix-review/
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