Thursday, 11 June 2020

Schools out for Covid19


Schools out for Covid19 ©
By
Michael Casey

Before I begin I’ll remind you 4 of the 6 of us were teachers, despite dad’s teacher saying to my dad in 1920/30s Kerry Ireland, one day Casey you will Hang. Me, I was just an Esol English teacher for a year, gaining Excellent, Excellent and Exemplary on my External assessment. Just so you know I’m not a Mickey Mouse person. Otherwise I am a “failure” with 1,615,138 Words to my name after 33 years of writing. So many words in fact that I’ve reached the limit on what the Word processor can handle. Though I doubt anybody else in the world has a 8241 page file, it’s all my stuff dumped together if you are wondering. Or it could be a list of Trump lies.

Now today I’m going to tell you how to get everybody back to school. You can adapt these thoughts, but just do it, as the phrase on a Tee shirt says. As some folks may not have wifi, even though I must have it for 20years now in some form or another, this is how to reach everybody.

Everybody does have a tv, and digital tv is the thing. These are loads of channels, so you grab 13 channels, one for each year group. You put a smart phone on a selfie stick and show the teacher. The feed via WhatsApp goes to a studio where it is then broadcast on the digital frequency for that year group. It’s basically as simple as that. We also have the RED button where you can split or add on extra channels. I could elaborate, but it really is that simple. You can have the feed repeated 24/7 on each channel, or added to the iplayer, so the classroom is available for a month or so. This really is a low tech solution, and it works. It’s like getting the Army to use morse again when satellites go dowm. Or in WWII Red Indians speaking their Native tongues helped beat the Japanese, because no way on God’s earth could it be intercepted.

You can waste time arguing the toss, just like the lost 3 years, when Politicians tried to disobey the will of the people over the EU thing. Whatever way you then thought. So now as it appears that Covid19 is less likely to kill schoolkids, I even read being struck by lightning is more likely, we can use a low tech solution. Put the classroom live on tv, on 13 digital channels. You can dress it all up, but it really is that simple. Because as BBC TV licencing will tell you, everybody has a tv, well apart from my brother who repeatedly got asked about his non-existent tv.

If teachers are afraid, that’s fair enough, we could dress the teachers up like robots in PPE, and some kids may say their teacher’s teaching skills are robotic, and yes I can hear the howl from teachers already. But everybody has to be creative, and expecting the Government to do everything is both Naïve and Stupid. Everybody needs to be creative, for the kids’ sake, or do you want a 200 questionnaire written out in triplicate first. Common sense and a can do attitude works wonders. Britain as well as being A Nation of Shopkeepers, which was the original title for The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker, is a Nation of Inventors. Usually the Americans buy up the idea and make the money. Now is the time to think like a child, because they have Imagination. We have playgrounds, put tented classrooms in the playgrounds. Blacks may even donate, or event companies. At least two classrooms can be put in the average playground, or can I hear they where will the kids play? This is a crisis time, in the War, Don’t you know there’s a war on? This was heard when folks moaned. It’s time to stop moaning and bitching, and put the Great back into Britain.

 

Wednesday, 10 June 2020

10th june 2020 the writer shaved

Looking your Best

Looking your Best ©
By Michael Casey
Of course I always look my best, my very best, with my stubble and breadcrumbs hanging from my mouth. If you don’t believe me the just look at  today’s photograph. I need a haircut too, I was going to lie in the grass and get a quick short back and sides as the good neighbour was cutting the lawn. But I resisted the temptation, though at this point in my life I’ll give in to all temptations. Though none are offered, maybe it’s the way I look?
So, what about you? Do you always look your best? Or are you, a take me as I am man, or woman? If none of us bothered then the Beauty Industry would be out of business. My old pen friend Jana was actually in a Euro Advert for Dove soap. She was stopped in the street and that led to the advert shown Euro wide. She is Czech after all, and twenty years ago when I visited Czech I did notice lots of beautiful people. Though now I just live with them, as my daughters are very pretty, it’s the Birmingham/Shanghai mixed blood you know.
But where was I? Sat here scratching my stubble, and why is stubble so scratchy? Answer that and you can have a prize, a photo of me in shades all stubbled up, or you can just look online and I can save on postage. Men are the scruffiest of all, with stains on their track suits from where they spilt their tea, or just peed down the side of their leg while on the toilet. Do they not know how to aim, they should sit at all times, and then their track suits wouldn’t be as stained. And certainly not as smelly. Wives and girlfriends wash their lads’ stuff  in the same wash as the dog’s blanket, and their incontinent granny’s stuff. So as not to pollute the rest of the family’s fancy clothes, all the way from Primark.
I just paused for a day while I showered and shaved, so I look slightly better than the latest photograph from yesterday. I like my readers to see what they are getting, luckily there is no smell with my words, or you’d all be opening a window right now. I do wash but, it’s my cheap and cheerful spray I use, it gets right up your nose, but it does keep the flies away, they use it to clean the drains. Jeyes Fluid in a little perfume bottle. Or am I joking?
Now how do you look your best? Well washing and combing your hair helps, otherwise I look like Dave Allen, finger intact, but hair all over the place. If you flick your hair one way then you look too much like Hitler, flick it the other way then you look like a male model. A comb is a deadly weapon, use it wisely or best not at all. Boris has his hair combed for tv by the makeup girl, then he tosses it again, so he looks like he’s just got out of bed.
A hairdresser is like a general lining up all the troops, but instead it’s the hair. Dandruff has to be killed without mercy, Head and Shoulders really works, as do the copy cat versions. So, a hairdresser knows how to manage your hair for you, or in these Covid19 days, just trust your girlfriend or your aged mum.
Once you have been dunked your grannie will throw a bucket of water over you to rinse away all the dandruff and suds. Next you have to dry your hair, so grannie will get you in a head lock and dry your hair with a towel. Hair driers weren’t invented in her days, so a towel on the head it’ll have to be. If your lucky she’ll use a clean towel and not the one she used on Rover the dog when he came in from a morning walk in the woods.  Once finished grannie will attack your head with a comb, though a hedgehog might hurt less. Then only when she is satisfied will she release you, but she spots a stray hair, so she spits a greenie into her palm before rubbing it into your head. Perfect she exclaims.
You want to wash your hair again, but there is no time, the doorbell rings. It’s your girlfriend, your hair looks great she says. So, grannie is vindicated. You smile at her and your grannie. So now you really are looking your best, so you leave all smiles. You tell your girlfriend that grannie was a little rough and your head hurts a bit, so your girlfriend consoles you by resting your head on her cushions, her 38DD cushions.
just a few translations for you all, the FULL list is on the site if you go look for it
Thanks for reading my stuff, my bewilder readers North South East and West and maybe on the Space Station too that’s if a fake email is to be believed. If you write in ENGLISH with a proper SUBJECT LINE or via the WordPress thing you may get a reply. But then you’d wish you didn’t bother, ha ha ha
Stay happy and be gentle when you wash your grannie’s hair, All things with Love.
Michael Casey in Birmingham ENGLAND
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Tuesday, 9 June 2020

The Dead and The Living

The Dead and The Living

The Dead and The Living ©
by
Michael Casey
I first saw a deceased when I was nine years old, my father said not
to worry as the dead are the same as the living, only the laughter
has left them, the sparkle has gone from their eyes , the worry has
been lifted from their shoulders, and their voice has vanished to
eternity.
In paradise the sparkle will return for it is the twinkle of the
stars, the laughter will return too for it is the morning breeze and
the turning tides are their sides shaking with laughter.
I treat the deceased with the same courtesy as I give to the living,
though I find the deceased are always more polite. My father also
had a few words to say about the living.
He said that the living are only the caretakers of the soul, yet
they think their existence is everything, that they know everything
because they experience many things with their senses.
What the living don’t acknowledge is that their time is short and
when I lay their bodies to rest then their souls continue without
them, without their strong, without their weak, without their
beautiful or even ugly temporary form, to where I cannot say, only
that it is a better place.
Percy the undertaker placed the lid on the coffin, the soul was free
THE BEGINNING
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Occasionally

Michael Casey latest photo 9th June 2020

yes it's me Michael Casey the fat silver haired writer in shades 9th June 2020

day off

day  off

kind of

windows 10 update scrambled my audio

so I had to restore windows 10, then hunt  drivers

my computer is back to normal now

one tip: use bluetooth to a smart speaker instead

it works, while you hunt the drivers

this has happened twice with windows 10

am I just lucky?

or is my computer old?

Saw True Lies with jamie lee curtis and Schwarzenegger

I will be having a cold shower before bedtime

Chile and Turkey passed by on the Wordpres

here UAE seems to like my writing

and Nights in Malta seems popular

So film producers do get in touch

michaelgcasey@hotmail.com will find me with "Film Script" in subject line








Sunday, 7 June 2020

Ivanka Trump 77x7

Ivanka Trump 77×7

Ivanka Trump 77×7
By Michael Casey
What have you done with your life?
I hid a Bible in a designer Handbag
So dad could pretend to be Holy
Though he never actually reads the Bible
Nor anything
He did say I created 15,000,000 jobs
He repeated it so many times
Goebbels taught dad everything about propaganda
I’m so sad I could not give a commencement speech
I could explain the horrors of too much choice
being spoilt for choice
Too many handbags and designer clothes and jewelry
The strain of being a working mum
It’s so hard this life, and being a wife too
I don’t know how I manage with only a Billionaire daddy
Yes I’ve never worked 12 hours night shifts
Yes I’ve never worked 12 hour day shifts standing all day long
Yes I’ve never helped clean toilets in a hotel with the crew
Yes I’ve never walked the security patrol in a hotel
Yes I’ve never had a car aimed at me by a thief
Yes I’ve never stood all day in a hot workplace
NO, having a sauna does not count
Yes, I’ve never got up early to catch a bus
Yes, I’ve never then jumped on a crowded train
Yes, I’ve never then walked a mile just to get to work
Yes, I’ve never then stood all day, for 12 hours in a hotel foyer
Yes, I’ve never carried heavy shopping home
Yes, I’ve never lived on cheap food, on frozen food
Yes, I’ve never worried about paying the rent
Yes, I’ve never worked in MacDonalds nor Wendy’s
Though I do have Scottish friends and a friend called Wendy
Yes I do like a drink, but never from plastic bottles
Yes, I’m healthy and can afford a doctor
Yes, I never worry about medication costs
Yes, I believe in choice,which specialist I should go to
Yes, this, yes that, yes yes and yes and I’ll have the same as her
I have a YES life
Nobody ever says NO to me
Nobody slams the door in my face
Nobody upsets me
Nobody rejects me
Nobody says sit at the back
Nobody says you cannot be in here
Nobody says queue here
Nobody, nobody, nobody
God says forgive not once but 77×7
So should we forgive you and your dad 77×7 times
Or should we throw out the salt that has lost its taste
Throw it out so it can be walked upon.
Sometimes we need to rebuild from the earth up
What did Jesus say to Saint Francis in Assisi
He said Rebuild my Church
So when your dad had his photo op, he could have misused that quote
Or he could have opened and actually read from the Bible
The true, non Goebbels meaning of the quote is:-
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace
Where there is hatred, let me sow love
Where there is injury, pardon
Where there is doubt, faith
Where there is despair, hope
Where there is darkness, light
And where there is sadness, joyO Divine Master, grant that I may
Not so much seek to be consoled as to console
To be understood, as to understand
To be loved, as to love
For it is in giving that we receive
And it’s in pardoning that we are pardoned
And it’s in dying that we are born to Eternal Life
Amen
So Ivanka and Donald are YOU going to be like Saint Francis
or like Goebbels

Portuguese Translations

Humour Writing by the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham England read in 167 countries so far https://www.amazon.co.uk/Micha...