Freddy MERCURY WAS MY MOUSTACHE
AS A KID I GREW A MOUSTACHE
ok i'm a yack it grew me
as I ws so bad at shaving i grew a moustache instead
and had it for years
I think in the end the lads said I looked like
Freddy Mercury
so I shaved it off
back then 50 years ago it was OPEN SEASON
if you were different
so I shaved it eventually
i had mastered shaving by then
15 I started maybe
and the mark on my chin
is from bad shaving
a growth that grows and I have to tame
so I don't look like a monstrous carbunkle
so if your SON or worst of all a daughter
grows a FREDDY MERCURY
just be honest
If it suits him great
but if it's just too ridiculous for words
TELL HIM ABOUT IT
did sideboards or sideburns
and FAT GIRLS
in thongs
come on , be honest LOOK IN THE MIRROR
YES I"M THE STUPIDEST MAN IN THE WORLD
but do take a minute to look in the Mirror
and CHANGE or shave
and if the shorts are too tight
you may need a BRAZILIAN
and I don't mean a coffee
before you leave the Building
Be honest with yourself
yes I am a gay dad , I KNOW ABOUT FASHION
I'm not a Freddie Mercury
I have 3 Shanghai girls in the house
a Sainsbury's carrier bag over their shoulder
looks better than any Devil wears Prada
Fact
Paris girls cry when Shanghai chic walks by in tramps clothing
YOU either HAVE or HAVE NOT got Style
OBVIOUSLY I do not have style
I have as much style as a bag of vomit
but I do know how to feed my donkey
not a metaphor
I feed the carrots from my vomit
to Donkey
Don Quiote and I am Sancho Panza his
DONKEY
do girls and boys this Schools out for. Summer
think about what you are wearing or growing
as even Alice Cooper can get caught
with his pants down
but that's another story
Roger the Van driver to cinema
he had a moustache and it suited him
I was the other one
carrying the baggage
Like a real Sancho Panza
and if Alice doesn't live here any more
this was the hardest work of my life but the MOST FUN, yes folks
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