Author: michaelgcasey
I'm
Michael Casey from Birmingham England, the fat silver haired writer in
shades. Beware of Others with the EXACT SAME NAME, they are not me, and
would not want to be me. Not unless they like arthritis,Tinnitus and much more, look for the
silly photos, NOT the stereo-typical "I am a writer" photos, which I
hate.
michaelgcasey is what you should look for and the TRANSLATIONS GALORE
here
on this site so tell all your friends all over the world, or just in
your street.
Remember too the click to Translate Button, so all of you everywhere
can "suffer" my words.
I write HUMOUR, with English Spellings, a relative of Arron's(only
joking)
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Michael-Casey/e/B00571G0YC for my 17 books
you can email,
email michaelgcasey@hotmail.com BUT WITH a good subject line
and rubbish will be deleted unread, with due respect.
I'm Michael Casey or just look for michaelgcasey, all one word.
or just look for my face, fat and silver haired usually wearing shades
so check both till you find all 17 books
1.The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker 2.Shoplife 3.Essays and Plays
4.Blogs 2011 5.300 and Not OUT 6.Shorts 2013 7.More Shorts 2014 8.Quick
Stories 9.Still Alive 2015 10.Undiscovered Words 2016 11.Still Smiling
2017 12.Altogether Now 13.New Horizons
14.14 Up 15.15 Down 16.Sweet Sixteen 17. 17 Again
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Michael-Casey/e/B00571G0YC to buy ebooks
THERE ARE OTHERS OF THE SAME NAME who are not me, SO LOOK FOR THE SILLY
PHOTOS
I did get 21,000 Polish readers just by word of mouth on my Site, for a
Translation of the finale of The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker in
just 3 weeks In Search of An Indian Princess is what I called the
finale. And a low budget film producer did take a look, so Spielberg how
about you finally running with that ball.
I called it In Search of an Indian Princess, the Polish Translation got
21,000 views in a few weeks.
I even had a low budget film producer have a look at it a few years ago.
So Spielberg it's still available and so am I.
My books on Amazon are a Shop Window until a fancy PUBLISHER or anybody
else picks me up, though I am very heavy, so don't hurt yourself
I started writing a long time ago. 1987 to be exact.
It took me a year to learn how to write. I spent 20 years listening to
BBC Radio 4 BEFORE I picked up a pen, this is quality speech radio,not
shock jock rubbish. I used to read by the yard too. I hope I write for
ears if that doesn't sound too pretentious. So that's 50 years in love
with Words, yes my birth certificate is so old, not me. I feel 20 in my
head, though on pain days I feel 95. Don't get Arthritis ++++ nor
skeletal muscular pain after a quadruple heart bypass, nor Tinnitus
since 2018, apart from that, I'm such a hunk, well to old ladies of 95.
And yes I like soft toilet paper too, or is that too much information?
2018 was the 30th Anniversary since The Butcher The Baker and The
Undertaker was born, in the living room behind me as I huddled the gas
fire.
My Face is on all the books so you know who to blame, I am not the Monk
or anybody else
THERE ARE OTHERS OF THE SAME NAME, SO LOOK FOR THE SILLY PHOTOS of me
www.michaelgcasey.typepad.com to HEAR my words, 200+ stories, 12hours
worth in Posh Birmingham
STOP PRESS, for those of you who wished I'd stop writing, well it nearly
happened. I had an Unplanned Triple Heart Bypass in Jan 2015, and I
didn't even know I had heart problems. 6 months later I learnt I had 4
grafts, so is that a Quadruple? Anyways Thanks to Birmingham's City
Hospital and our Queen Elizabeth hospital I am still here with you.
Though I'm still getting pain as it takes a long time to heal, and just
for fun my Arthritis plays up too. And yes I write about pain as well,
for without pain in our life we have not experienced all of life. Though
I'd love a break from all the pain, as would all of us.It descends
randomly like mist, and on occasions I can barely talk with pain. Its
13thMarch2019 now and I've reached about 1,449,000 Words or nearly 4300
pages if you stack it all up. Its taken me 30 years now, I know I only
look 25, well in my imagination anyway. I've done 44,000 words of my
18th book so far, about 118 pages.
Biography
I've been close but no cigar most of my life, such as having a play
accepted by a professional theatre back in 1989, the play was Shoplife.
They called it Sparkling, very real, great fun. hilarious, we could not
stop reading it. This gave me the confidence to ignore all negative
nasty not nice neighbours, who used too must alliteration, to be
negative about my writing. However Life is not a straight road, its more
a long and winding road. I can even remember being at grammar school
when Monty Python first came out. And look what happened to them. One of
my brothers was actually at the same college and University as John
Cleese, Downing Cambridge. Another brother was at the same college and
University as Mr Bean, Queens Oxford. I'm name dropping just in case
Andrew at the Daily Mail, editor is reading this. As for me I went to
work. Our dad by the way was a Blacksmith then sweated for 40 years in a
steel works, in Brasshouse Lane Smethwick. Me I was a computer operator
back in 1978 on Dec PDP 1170s, 40 years ago,and then a variety of other
jobs, I had my working life in reverse.
The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker is a slow burner that really
does catch fire, and the best place to be when a book catches fire is,
down the pub, The Trader in the book. Hidden in the cellar since WWII is
a hoard of whisky, whisky galore you might say. When the street of
shops in the book is threatened the shopkeepers can and will resort to
anything. Such as a Poet and Undertaker using blackmail. When Patrick
finds his one true love, and breaks the bed to prove it what does his
priest do? The priest makes him organise a fete for the children's home,
now that he has made a baby he has to take responsibility for it, and
the children's home fete. The priest too uses a little blackmail, so the
local police stop all traffic and detour it so as it passes the
children's home 3 times, just in time for the fete. The Butcher The
Baker and The Undertaker is a fun book for all the family with an
explosive ending. 21,000 POLISH READERS CANNOT BE WRONG. The
Translations of The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker on this site
are read all over the world
So buy it. Amazon Kindle books can be downloaded to Kindle, PC and
Laptop. So you have no excuse, or does the writer have to persuade you?
888888888
https://michaelgcaseyfrombirminghamengland.wordpress.com/
&
http://butcherbakerundertaker.blogspot.co.uk/
Now my book of blogs has many funny pieces in it, here's a taster of
what you get if you buy the book. 300 and Not OUT, called very funny by
one publisher.
All I need is a Fairy Godmother and then you can all surf on my
1,458,000 words. And I can pay off the mortgage on the new house, and
donate to my daughters as University beckons. As for my own Future? God
Alone Knows.
Stuffing Tony©
By Michael Casey
Stuffing Tony, what am I talking about, no not our tame turkey whom
we've decided to eat, nor anything else. Tony is in fact a soft toy,
he's my small daughter's favourite, the one she loves the most. He's a
white tiger, he was in fact he was her sister's Birthday tiger from a
few years ago, but she cried until she owned him. Tony is a very washed
out bleached kind of tiger. Tony has been through the washing machine a
couple of times, he was very very dizzy when he came out. Yesterday Tony
got a brother, his brother is a ginger tiger, now christened Ginger.
Ginger makes us laughter because Ginger is how English people call my
wife if they cannot pronounce her Chinese name.
Tony is one of 40 stuffed toys the girls have, they live up a corner
behind the sofa which is just behind me. They are allowed out to form a
class when my small daughter plays teacher, afterwards they climb back
into their Iceland bags and go to sleep. There is a problem with Tony
though, he's lived in the fast lane and lost a lot of weight. So
following strict instructions, today I have done a stuffing transplant,
which is like a heart transplant but much more important and dangerous.
Today without any sedative I have made Loony Chick donate some stuffing
to Tony. I took the scissors and make an incision in Loony Chick's
behind, I then proceeded to remove the stuffing. I had previously made
an incision in Tony's neck at the back, it was then a process of
removing from Loony Chick and stuffing Tony.
The whole procedure lasted 20mins, Tony now looks very plumped up and
proud, as the leader of the pride should look. As for Loony Chick, he,
she or should I say it now looks as if he'd had a few dodgy kebabs, very
slim, but at least the head still looks plump. When the girls come home
from school we'll decide what to do with Loony Chick, should we stuff
him with chopped up old clothes, or bubble wrap? Or should he face the
death sentence and be sent to a Charity shop, I know it sounds cruel,
but since he came back from Shanghai in 2009 he'd mainly been a cushion.
These are the very serious things a modern parent has to deal with,
luckily I know how to sew, and I have a special relationship with all
the toys. Now that Tony is full and looks like a weightlifting Tiger I
hope Ginger won't be jealous, otherwise one of them may have to end up
in a zoo, or the closest equivalent, in one of the 13 charity shops near
our house.
https://michaelgcaseyfrombirminghamengland.wordpress.com/
www.michaelgcasey.typepad.com to HEAR me read my stuff
http://butcherbakerundertaker.blogspot.co.uk/
are places to read my stuff, comic in the main.
I'm NOT on Facebook, you can only find me on my sites.
Though you can tell all your FB friends about me
or email michaelgcasey@hotmail.com in English only, I delete many Junk
emails daily, unopened
I would love a spot in a newspaper or magazine, print or online,
alongside the fish and chips.
I'm honest enough to say I'm as good as the stuff you read online or in
newspapers, and yes I've known this for years, 30 years, if I
flash/expose my ability for a second.
Ok, I've put my quill away in the inkwell.
I would love a spot on the radio too, 90 seconds with Michael, could be
expanded to an hour.
where I'd read a blog out on the radio every day. I have 2000+ inc
repeats.
So if you agree with me that it would be a great feature do get in touch
I HAVE RECORDED 200 PLUS STORIES ABOUT 12 HOURS WORTH SO FAR.
PERFECT FOR RADIO SO DO GET IN TOUCH or just listen
www.michaelgcasey.typepad.com
I also think a book of my stories with facing page translation plus my
audio
attached would be a great way to teach English via humour to foreigners
I have enough material for a series of books. And yes I was an ESOL
teacher for a year too, in an Islamic school, I was called excellent,
excellent and exemplary by the external assessor, and yes I'd never
actually taught before I stood up and tried it. I had spent 3 years as a
concierge ++++ so I knew I could do it, as it's just talking. And I had
all the writing experience too, and by the way the wife is from
Shanghai.
So Angel investors get in touch
My shorts/blogs are a coffee and a biscuit long, I have 12 hours worth
recorded already.
www.michaelgcasey.typepad.com
My 17 books can be bought here on Amazon Kindle,
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Michael-Casey/e/B00571G0YC/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0
1.The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker 2.Shoplife 3.Essays and Plays
4.Blogs 2011 5.300 and Not OUT 6.Shorts 2013 7.More Shorts 2014 8.Quick
Stories 9.Still Alive 2015 10.Undiscovered Words 2016 11.Still Smiling
2017 12.Altogether Now 13.New Horizons 14.14 Up 15.15 Down 16.Sweet
Sixteen 17. 17 Again
DON'T FORGET KINDLE BOOKS CAN BE LOADED TO PC AND LAPTOP NOT JUST
KINDLE.
And, there's more, I have readers all over the world, 60 plus countries,
so my humour does travel.....
Even if I don't, pain attacks for want of a better word, can come
suddenly, so I doubt if I'll ever have another holiday, a screamer
wouldn't go well on an airline.
Let There Be Light ©
By Michael Casey
Let my tears be my words
Let the candle light be my eyes
Let the flowers in bloom be my lips
Let their scent be my blood
Let the wind be my breath
Let clouds be my mood
Let children’s laughter be my hope
Let widows’ sighs be my conscience
Let a stranger’s prayers be my delight
Let the bees be my wisdom
Let the trees be my strength
Let my patience reach to the stars
Let me be always remembered in your prayers
new for 2019 a brand new poem
Let My Heart Sing©
By Michael Casey
Let my heart sing
Let my smile shine
Let my laughter ring
Let my joy spread
Let my light fill my life
Let my words be wise
Let my ears never deaf to your needs
Let my eyes always see the good
Let my shoulders never buckle under any weight
Let my feet always bring me back home
Let my fingers never need to be crossed
Let there always be one thing to be remembered by
Love and Charity for Others, my sisters and brothers
So when I am dust, remember me for what I tried to be
A singer singing a song even though I always sung badly,
Because in my heart I was Singing as we all should in Harmony.
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
and that's your lot, go and buy my books on Amazon now. Though I don't
expect such miracles, as "the Internet is Free" and nobody wants to pay
me....
I'll go away and cry now.....
hope you liked yesterday’s piece
my back was playing up for 3 days
and so it was nice to do a new piece
I never know what I’ll write
I just hope it amuses
Shades of Tom Sharpe I’d say, Wilt, Porterhouse Blue and all that style
My PhD friend introduced me to him 30 years ago, there were even tv shows.
My computer takes 20 mins to boot fully now so it is on its way out
I have backed off my stuff ready for it to die.
I spotted SAR China reading me today, so feel free to send me a fast desktop to replace
the one which is about to die. The computers are all made in China after all.
I won’t hold my breath but all donations gratefully received, there are many many
rich people in China after all. You could even adopt me, now there’s an offer.
Stay Happy, and love what you an do. In my case writing stories, it is all I can do,
nobody wants me as a hunk. Is it the colour of my hair, I’ll never know.
https://www.blogger.com/profile/08360300604946924721
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