The Shakespeare Collection Posts on his Birthday

Shakespeare an old neighbour always used to shout, turn it down Michael I'm writing a play. So I'd always say any good? They he'd stare at me. He quite likes my Genesis, he always says the beginning is so important. As for the middle, it should be meaty, so Barry White hits the spot. As for the end, a bit of a Starry Starry night as I like looking at Sky, And all played not on a stage though Music is Global, ask Shakespeare, but you'll have to shout as he's gone drinking with Falstaff and that Prince Hal. Yes get in the Groove with your music, for it be the food of life, let it be and let it play on.  michaelgcasey

 Shakespeare and Me ©

By

Michael Casey

Well we continue with Freeview tv and wait for our Broadband too, so it was great to stumble over a programme on Shakespeare, while my kids hid in the next room and attacked our piano. And no they don’t play Chopsticks, even though they are 1/2 Shanghai Chinese, they are in fact both Grade One on piano, and my big daughter has her Deans Award for choral singing. Me I just sing along to the radio, luckily our neighbours are all deaf.

So now that John Nettles has finished talking about Will Shakespeare it gave me the idea about talking about Words. I can never invent as many new words as Will did, he’s had a 400 year head start after all, but I hope I can raise a few laughs by my use of words, or my cartoons made with words. Words give you a picture and can be very colourful, especially if events drive you to curse, so long as alls well that ends well as Will used to say.

I read recently, and no I don’t mean I learnt to read recently, as Will’s wordplay would say, that swearing denotes a higher level of intelligence. So Teamsters must be really highly educated, and rappers must be the most highly intelligent people of all. Discuss, or not discuss that is the question, whether a Blankety Blank is nobler that a Zippy Zap Dang and can you move or remove your Thang, or is it Thong?  

Will has given me a few thoughts now, we are connected you know his Ghost sleeps under my bed, I would never share a bed with a man, only Ghost or no Ghost. A women is acceptable but no men in my bed. So how about an all Pop Version of Shakespeare, though some may say Baz from Moulin Rouge has done it already. But Pray Forgive me and I offer my Humble Version of Will Shakespeare a la Pop plus.

Zoons says Snoop Dog as he lashes out with words, rhythms must be heard, no matter how absurd. Lionel Richie is all soft and sooth, he is dragged away and put in stocks, why does he wear those absurd golfing socks. Big bad Barry White strides onto the stage scattering all before him, he is the Man for all Seasons and many many more, nobody defy him or he’ll sing them to the floor. Lionel Richie sings once twice three times a lady, and he is dressed to play the female part just as they did in Shakespeare’s day.

50 Cent comes on all draped in Gold, he is giving Measure for Measure and much much more, his girls adorn the floor. Eminem climbs the ivy to the lady’s chamber, only she’s a lady, so Beyonce throws her chamber pot full of ale over his head, he can find another amour instead.

Stephen Fry wanders on stage, quoting Shakespeare, offering a pound of flesh, but 50 cent says he has 100s of pounds flesh, bowing to his ladies at his feet. Stephen Fry mutters something before breaking out into a break dance. Stephen Fry swivels on his head, like a Jester begging for his bread. The rappers applaud and throw coins at him, ok only 50 cents in total, but Stephen Fry will appear for any small amount, it all goes into his Barclay Bank account.

Lady Gaga appears in mist as Lady Macbeth, she may have been  born that way, but on the stage she knows her measure for measure. Tina Turner is a Shrew who’ll never be tamed, not by Lionel Richie nor 50 cents, but when Barry White hits those low notes, she’ll be HIS lady, his ever so sweet lady, and Lionel Richie can just watch dressed in his frock still in the stocks.

The ghost of Sinatra appears and sings My Way, what else, Shakespeare himself applauds from the wings, if only Sinatra was around when he had his Globe theatre, Andrew Lloyd Webber would not have bothered to be born. He would have been really useful with the thunder machine though. Elvis was due to appear too, but he had left the building before the audience arrived. Time and Tide waits for no man after all.

One Direction and the Jonas Brothers fight it out for Juliet’s affections

Fighting with Ballads as the audience goes to the bar unimpressed, Will Shakespeare’s Globe had the very first Stella Artois after all. And on it goes, till Meatloaf and Alice Cooper descend to the stage dressed as angels and say the final words, Sleep Well Dear Audience, and if things go bump in the night it may just be somebody sneaking into Michael Casey’s bed for the night. The Ghost of Shakespeare or the Lady Macbeth herself.

 Shakespeare and all that (c)

By Michael Casey

I just read in the Daily Telegraph that Shakespeare was coming back, no not from the dead just back to the syllabus. Yes Shakespeare can be hard, very hard even. Nowaday you can get good notes. For example Cliffs notes on Internet for Macbeth or whatever. Then on Amazon by Longman's guide to Macbeth. Then back to Utube/Internet and you'll get 4 versions of the play. So that's a head start already, assuming your teacher is good they he/she will bring it to life for you. I'd say read the play, look at the Cliffs notes on your own before the teacher starts on the course. If you are doing it on your own for fun or for the OU then just read he play look at the notes, watch all 4 versions of the play on Utube. You can even find sites that'll have essays on the subject. You may have to pay a few quid for access, OR you just read the 1st page of over 40 essays. The internet is your library so use it. Get drunk and read it, or have 4 litres of Dr Pepper, 10 bars of chocolate or whatever makes you happy then read the play. I did a bit of Shakespeare at the OU and I taught a bit too, so I know its doable. Don't be afraid, its just words on paper. BUT you can bring them to life, put silly voices on, do silly walks, sit in MacDonalds and do it. Go to the park and do it. Chop it to size, and do it. 14 years ago I relearnt my Spanish in a couple of months, all I did was 15mins a day, every day for a couple of months. I chopped the Spanish to size. Shakespeare is simpler than doing Spanish after a 25year break. Once in Barcelona I spent a week in a tapas bar, but that's another story. Please Please Please give Shakespeare a try. There are tavelling theatre companies after all, get your school to get one to come and put on a show. Did you know there are even theatre companies that work in prisons? We had a film called Shakespeare in Love go and watch that. Then with fear banished, lose your virginity with Shakespeare.

NOVEMBER 28TH, 2012 18:42

Shakespeare was ………..

By michaelgcasey

I’ve been watching the Sky Arts prog on Shakspeare. It was interesting but left me feeling empty. My tutor once said I was Shakespeare’s agent when I wrote an essay 20 years plus ago, all I can remember is that I got 74%. There was a documentary about Will on BBC2 a few years ago and that make a compelling case for Will being from Stratford. It highlighted all of Will’s influences and perhaps he was a Catholic too, how all of life’s events made Will the man he was. How he learnt so much stuff, so he was able to write what he did write, Will was the man. In good Will hunting the cleaner can do maths problems that out fox the greatest brains, in the end though that Will finds out the most important thing of all LOVE.

Scholars say that Will Shakespeare couldn’t know this and he couldn’t know that, and he couldn’t possibly be so mean, according to the Sky Arts program. In real life we all know some Son Of a Bitch, who seems so nice but in reality he’s a SOB, if only we knew about things but the person seemed so nice so genuine, but in reality…  People have got away with murder and things even worse than murder, but we don’t have hindsight.

Shakespeare is the same, he amazes us, he touches us.  Steven King frightens us to death, doesn’t mean he should be on Death Row, he must be warped because of the way he writes. It is his job, it was Shakespeare’s job, writing is what people do, you don’t have to be a Saint to pray and you don’t have to be Satan to curse and do worse. And if only we didn’t mix the two up with current sad and tragic events in the news….

Shakespeare is fun and kids do him at school, Macbeth is being studied by our kids if they are old enough to be in the GCSE class today. Cliff Notes and BBC Bitesize are a great help. But back to the plot, I feel the older BBC documentary was more accurate, and I vote for that version of Will’s identity. If I can  do my bit of writing, from my own background then why on earth cannot Will be the man who wrote his own stuff. Clever people are trying to hang their own coat on Will’s frame, but sadly the cloakroom tickets have fallen off and the wrong garments are being given to the wrong man.

Michael

p.s. I still maintain that Prince Hal was a bit of a lad and would abandon Falstaff  once Kingship beckoned

http://butcherbakerundertaker.blogspot.co.uk/

The Simpsons are modern Shakespeare ©

By Michael Casey

I just read a piece in this morning’s DT it was about the Vatican’s newpaper and the Simpsons.

The DT comment button did not work so I’ve written this piece instead.

Shakespeare touches all of us, once we learn or are taught how to understand it. It may mean a West Side story experience. It may mean Shakespeare in Love or a  modern version with Leonardo di Caprio.

But it is all Shakespeare, yes I know the literati  will moan as the always do, but underneath it is Shakespeare. It’s the universality of it, www.michaelgcaseytypepad.com  for my stuff, more like an Ealing Comedy. But back to today the Vatican/Jesuit take on the Simpsons. My girls tease and say I’m like the dad in the Simpsons, I tell them I’m much much slimmer. Comedy pokes fun and draws us closer together as we laugh at what’s happening, and a big part is laughing at others’ suffering, PC people will spin in their  graves, and the soon the better.

There was  a really good series on tv about Shakespeare and how he could have been a secret Catholic amongst other things, not to mention his eclectic background, he could touch bases with so many things because of his life experience. So the Simpsons touch bases with us because it highlights the worst in us all, and then we laugh at ourselves, there is no “I couldn’t possibly  be like that” because we ARE like that. I suppose in the New Testament the common touch in the language/life draws us towards the Divine, The Simpsons could it be called the common man’s Bible? I don’t know, you’ll have to read more of the Bible and watch more of the Simpsons. And ask the Jesuits who write the Vatican newspaper, me I’m going to find my deck of cards you may remember the song.

Shakespeare was a robot

did you know Shakespeare was a robot
by michaelgcasey
June 19, 2003, 03:09 PM 

did you know that if you post a message nobody ever reads it , its just answered by a Japanese robot trained at Oxford University so it speaks or rather types correctly , I myself am a Birmingham Robot , born or rather constructed at the University here in Birmingham , a great world leader in Engineering/Medicine and much more , Birmingham is also where my writing was constructed with the aid of millions of gallons of milk consumed by myself , donated by daisy the cow www.michaelgcasey.typepad.com   so if you want to read how Shakespeare's work was constructed using a computer program 400 years old then first go to my site and believe , and then you too can become an American TV evangelists and fleece millions of people out of millions of dollars , look out the FBI is out there looking for You , yes you , scratching your head , was this induced by too many substances , or just two orders of egg fried rice from the Chinese take away , or was it just

i m a g i n a t i o n . use your brain before you die 

 https://michaelgcaseyfrombirminghamengland.wordpress.com 

something for Shakespeare’s Birthday

Balance in Life

Balance in Life ©

By

Michael Casey

Well I haven’t written a new piece in a couple of days so I think you are overdue a new story. Spare Us O Lord I can hear you all mutter, which is not very kind, one day your kids could be forced to read me. Why has it gone all dark in here, has somebody slammed the lid of their laptop closed? Come on let me out, I’m afraid of the dark. Totoro, Totoro help me escape. I’m shaking the cat treats, Totoro will force the lid of your laptop open so I’ll be able to continue annoying you all.

I’ll ignore class 5B2, they were always the wicked group at school, now where was I? Yes, Balance in Life. We all need our Work, Rest and Play, and yes it’s Shakespeare’s Birthday in the morning, 23^rd April 2018. He must be getting a really good Pension now after all these years. We all need a Balance in life, especially if we are Grocer, we have to have our Ying and Yang,and even our Ying tong iddle I po . you may be wondering what is that fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham the one in England is on about. So here’s a link, listen to it then come back to me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nebe1zuEtbc 

And that is the Humour Prince Charles grew up with, little wonder the Queen rolls her eyes when HE calls her Mummy. As for me I got the repeats years later, repeats as in bathroom repeats, or do I mean radio repeats. Which brings me back to today, we all need a balance of work, rest and play. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy they say. We all need a release, otherwise we explode, and no I’m not talking about the size of my belly, or my bathroom noises.

If you work in a library all week, or an accountancy office which is even quieter than a mortuary. I’m not lying I once temped in an accountancy place, it was quieter than the graveyard. Well if you work quiet then you play noisy. You will be in the Abacus Five a Heavy Metal band at the weekends, just to break the silence, or you may just eat loads of kebabs, either one will do. You scream and shout and let it all out, because in your day job you are just so QUIET, screamingly QUIET. Its A BALANCE.

I mentioned elsewhere that we hope for good news tomorrow, which Fate has decided is Shakespeare’s Birthday. However Fate has also brought some sad news to us this weekend, so that has cast a cloud us, so it is Life’s Eternal Balance. Like you finally get that promotion at work in the Embalming and Morticians Society, but your girlfriend leaves you the very same day, because she thinks you are cheating on her. She thinks there is another girl on the slab only there is not. So  your joy at promotion and recognition is worthless because you have lost the love of the girl you love.

So you drown your sorrows and end up falling into the canal at the Gas Street Basin in Birmingham. You would have drown, but for an off duty policeman and his sister. He has just come out, and his sister is supporting him in his decision. They both hear the splash and they drag you out. Together they give you mouth to mouth. This leads to an award to the off duty Policeman, his colleagues are so proud of him. He has the courage to tell them he is coming out, they all cheer, they are all detectives after all, so they already knew for months.

But what of the sister? She was doing morticians foundation course with a view of joining the craft. So obviously she is smitten and yes, in due course they make love on a slab in the grave yard. The living giving the dead a peek show. Balance in life is so important, and especially so when you are on a small gravestone.

If you can laugh and take break from all your serious and challenging work, then you are the better for it when you return to your job. Bricklayers and Crane drivers on massive building sites may be ballet fans on their off days, they put on a suit and go watch the ballet at the Birmingham Hippodrome. The beauty and romance of the ballet with wonderful music being such a change from being 200metres up in a crane just with a bottle to pee in. You don’t think he’ll climb all the way up and down just for a wee wee do you?

Or laying bricks in the freezing cold, with just your wife’s tights below your work jeans, to stop your assets being frozen so much, not even your wife could unfreeze them. So there you have it, the macho of macho men can and do go to the ballet, which reminds me of a story I have ready about Ballet, I may have even written it already, I write so much I have to check my lists. From be bad and tough builders to ballet nuts, and ballet fans know all about nuts, its the very tight tights.

We all need an escape, something to take the pressure off. A swearing bullying transport manager, trucks don’t just drive themselves, they need a bit of encouragement, and the Queen’s English has to be augmented from time to time. Well so what will Dave or even Florence do at the weekends? They will teach sign language to the Deaf, because their mum or aunty who they adored was deaf, so at weekends they spend their time in utter silence teaching sign language. And when the lads at the Depo found out, what did those bunch of truckers say? They insisted on learning signing too, especially curses, just for fun. Though today the London Marathon had 14 truckers running for a deaf charity. To save energy they used signings to curse each other as they ran the 26 miles.

This is Ying and Yang balance in life, it brings out the best in all of us, and it saves us all. So I hope tomorrow as you all quote Shakespeare to each other that you remember some of Shakespeare is absolute funny filth, and other parts of Shakespeare are and always will be the sweetest and most beautiful language in the world. So I’ll bid you all farewell for tonight, I just hope I can sign it right.

What is the difference between a Poet and a Prose writer? (c)

What is the difference between a Poet and a Prose writer? (c)

By

Michael Casey

Well a poet evokes a feeling with words and rhyme, though a poem does not have to rhyme. Prose is longer and the writer paints a picture through his words. I'd say the poet via poetry is quicker, the writer has to evoke things by explanation and by telling a tale, perhaps with a list of things. Satchel, tie, blazer and polished shoes = school.

 Sometimes a poem is too complicated you cannot understand it, Japanese have 3 line poems which are very very deep.

 I for one need poetry explained to me.

 Andrew Graham-Dixon  explains Art via his programmes on tv, what I need is a Poet to explain poetry, I feel a tv series is in the making.

 AS for Prose what I do here and on my site 

https://michaelgcaseyfrombirminghamengland.wordpress.com

 I can understand Prose fair enough , but I do know that style can either kill or illuminate things.

 Dan Brown and JK Rowling are very popular but I cannot read them as I don't like their style. Terry Pratchet is another writer I cannot get. 

 Read The Book Thief now that really one of the best books I've ever read in my life. His writing is so poetic.

 Reporters/ Journalists  have a style too, sadly some American journalists have the same dull style. 

The I've seen everything so I'm going to pretend  I'm an undertaker at a funeral. 

Me I think you should talk to your audience, Prose is all about talking, so people are hearing your words, its not a puzzle or an exam, writing should be for the EARS!

www.michaelgcasey.typepad.com   to HEAR me read some of my 1300 to 1700 pieces.

Interviewing © something I wrote for my Esol Students back in 2011

Interviewing©

 By

 Michael Casey

Welcome to Casey’s Company

As you can see we are a friendly company

Would you like a drink before we begin?

Sorry only tea or coffee, no Vodka or lager

At Christmas, then that would be different

But today you are here to be interviewed.

Now why did you apply for  a position at Casey’s Company?

Because you liked the 12 weeks holiday a year, but you do do preparation at home.

Because you liked carrying a briefcase, because you liked wearing shiny black shoes and a nice shirt and tie.

Or was it because you liked the idea of being called Sir?

What qualities can YOU bring to the role?

What experience do you have in a similar role?

How would you describe yourself?

Are you self motivated?

Pardon? Can I stop because you want to go and have a wee?

Ok are you ready to resume?

You want to go out and make an emergency phone call to your mum, you forgot to ask her to buy some more toilet paper, and some beef burgers and tomato ketchup.

Anything else?

Ok, lets move on.

So do you enjoy where you are employed at the moment?

You’re not employed at the moment.

You were sacked!

Why?

You were found kissing in the stationary cupboard, and when security searched you, you had 120 red pens and 120 blue pens, and 120 black pens in your nice fake leather briefcase. So you were sacked on the spot. The Police were not called in as the girl you were kissing in the stationary cupboard was the bosses daughter.

But you do have a glowing reference.

Looking at the signature it looks remarkably like YOUR handwriting.

Is there anything more you’d like to add?

You’d like to have the 1^st two weeks of August off, as you’ve already booked your holiday, other than that you can start straight away.

Oh, you forgot something, could you be paid weekly and in cash.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME.

Oh and when will we let you know if you have been successful in your application for the post.  

A Cat's Tale from 1 year ago

A Cat’s Tale ©

By 

Michael Casey

As you all know we have a cat, or as on DT reader said, the cat has you. You do not own a cat, you are just part of its world. The cat allows you to feed it and look after it, the cat, or Totoro as our kitten is called is just playing with us. Totoro knows he has nine lives, and 4 people queuing up to stroke him, though we discovered he was in fact a she. That was Totoro’s first deception, if he was a male maybe we wouldn’t have as much work to do. 

Totoro just loves running and I mean running around the house and bouncing from one new settee to another, in between diving at the scratch post we bought. Then he’ll or rather she’ll wait next to a door so she can bounce around the next room. She likes diving from the old sofa to the piano, and then to the bookcase and a with a flip over the old covered orange chair to the front room window windowsill. I’m sure she’s on drugs. Whenever I take out my bag of medicine she always wants to dive inside. Perhaps in another life she was a drugs dealer, she just loves trying to get into my bacg of heart medicine.

So as she has had her two inoculations I decided to let her have more supervised play time in the garden, I don’t believe in cats being house cats, cats like walking on fences and howling at the moon. So Totoro was good and came back when I shook the bag of cat treats, £1 from Poundland, in fact Totoro would sell her soul for a cat treat. This worked fine for a day or so. Then maybe it was the hot weather the cat disappeared, I’d been having an afternoon rest, much needed  after cardiac surgery, so I had to investigate the case of the missing kitty.

We looked high and low, you have to as kittens can climb, eventually my small daughter found her asleep in the store where we keep the grass cutters. It was a warm and secure place, so obviously that was where Totoro chose to sleep. Later on Totoro  decided to have another adventure, she disappeared up the alley and over fences, to have tea with the other cats. Tea could be a metaphor for many things. Four fools went ashearching, the kitten just laughed, we must have spent a couple of hours in the pursuit. The neighbourhood cats just laughed looking on from roof tops and from back bed room windows, where they were watching budding computer geniuses when they weren’t looking out the window.

As twilight fell Totoro allowed herself to be caught, kittens control owners, it is never the other way around. So relieved Totoro was borne home and lauded and fed. So Totoro went to bed happy with a smile on her face, maybe plotting her next big adventure. Today the sun had its hat on, the hottest day of the year, so Totoro had her next plan ready. I’d been up at the secondary school to do some admin for my small daughter’s transfer, the sun had its hat on, but Totoro had her coat on.

I let her out for supervised play then she disappeared, first up a tree like a tree surgeon or even a mountain climber, how can kittens climb so fearlessly, I pretended to be a dog in an effort to get her to come back, but this did not work. I shaked the cat treats, but she was not interested, so this kitten had no soul to sell. My brother would have sold his soul for a Rolo as a child but Totoro was soulless.

I went on the school run and came home with a concerned child, so she prayed to Saint Martin de Porres  again, asking him to bring back Totoro home. It had worked yesterday twice, so would this be third time lucky. I told her cats like traveling, they have several owners, and even several aliased, and get fed by all. Not to worry, and if Totoro loved us then she would return.

I then went for my post cardiac rest, you cannot worry too much about a cat when you have to listen to your body. Nearly six months post op and still a lot of pain and new pain from my old arthritis, besides we had cats for 30 years at home, I know cats can look after themselves.

When I arose, like Dracula, they gave me Iron tablets last week, anyway the cat had come running after her name had been called. All’s well that ends well, as some fellow writer from down the road from my house once said. You just have to trust a cat’s nature, she isn’t worried about you, she’s just plotting to do just exactly what she wants to do. A cat owns you and you just have to accept it, she’ll please herself, she has her own life to lead, nine in fact, and you are just lucky if she shares one of them with you.

As these tears fall

As these tears  fall ©

By Michael Casey

As these tears fall, we remember we have been here before.

As these tears fall, the love we feel hurts so much more.

As these tears fall, we are stunned and don't know what to say.

As these tears fall, we must remember them all.

As these tears fall, we think of the smiles.

As these tears fall, we remember the laughter.

As these tears fall, we remember the kisses.

As these tears fall, we touch their things that will never be used again.

As these tears fall, we finish ironing the shirt or the trousers that will never be worn again.

As these tears fall, we feel a hole in our heart that aches so much.

As these tears fall, we remember their touch, comforting and more.

As these tears fall, we are heartbroken for our lost futures.

As these tears fall, we give thanks for what we did have.

As these tears fall, love carries on, we will meet again.

***********

this is from July 2012, something in the news sparked the piece 6 years ago.

Monday is a very big day in our family, hopefully tears of joy, well almost, will fall.