My Wife The House Painter

My Wife The House Painter ©

By Michael Casey

As I speak my wife is painting the bathroom. Its 9:45pm and the kids are all tucked up in bed. So she can paint away to her heart’s content. She is a much better painter than me, if any of you have trawled to the bottom of my site you will have read Michael’s Bathroom a tale of paint and disaster from 11 years ago, from before I met my Shanghai wife. That’s her 10years ago on my profile photos. Right now she’s wearing her pink and red strawberry pattern pyjamas while she paints. She is very good, she can even do intricate calligraphy, I think its because she’s good at that so she’s good with a paint brush in her hands. Earlier I had to test our 5 year old  ready for her spelling test in the morning. She got 10/10 last week so we want her to continued. I got her to write the spellings out while I said them for her, you have  to try and sound out all the letters, and remember the “baby” pronunciations too. She got lunch wrong she spelt it “luch” so I got her to write it out ten times correctly, only she wrote it out ten times incorrectly, so I encouraged her again and she wrote it out 10 times again, but this time correctly. We never had any of this 40 years ago, education has progressed in leaps and bounds. My other daughter had homework and a crossword too, I had to explain what crosswords were all about, and not arguing, but words that crossed and fitted into each other like Jigsaws. She also had some maths, she was on a high because she was the best in her class that day. The teacher made her a bracelet out of stickers as a reward. But my big daughter has been “cheating”, while she was in Shanghai her grannie, Ma, had given her lots of homework everyday. Ma was the accountant for the bus  company you see, when I 1st visited Shanghai in 2000 I had been in her office and there is a photo of me trying to safe crack her safe, the bus company safe. My daughter has in fact got a photo of Ma and my wife with the safe behind them on her bedside table. Ma’s brother a former journalist also gave my daughter homework while she was visiting his house for a few days. So it was that combination of Chinese discipline and love, that had helped her so much. Now she is in bed asleep, the smell of paint is slowly drifting towards me though 2 doors are firmly closed, but in the morning I will have a new bathroom, so much better compared to when I did it. Being married these past few years has given me an appreciation of the finer things in life, and one of them is to know when to “allow” my wife to dabble with a paintbrush. We just have to make sure the girls don’t touch anything in the morning. I should say that one thing I go get my girls to do every night is to say their prayers. At the moment there is a little girl of about their age who has just been diagnosed with cancer, so I ask my girls to pray for her. They say that a sinner’s prayers are golden , a child’s prayers are golden too, so if any of you who are reading this can spare some time then DO pray for that child. I remember back in 1998 I was in Paris and I stumbled on a funeral and they were saying that the deceased was a traveller and there I was a traveller at his funeral, so of course I prayed for him. So now I ask the same of you, please pray for this child.
Tomorrow is another day, tomorrow I may have a new job, I’ve been redundant 8 weeks tomorrow. I could be getting a new job with a different Law Firm. All I need is a new lick of paint and then I’ll be ready for the rest of my life. It would be a good birthday present too, that’s all I have to say tonight, except buy some paint brushes for the Love in your life.

Michael 17/09/09

Why is America Afraid of Charles Darwin?

I just read in The Daily Telegraph, a major English newspaper that  a new film about Darwin has failed to find a distributor in the USA. I am shocked and saddened. Why? Because nobody in the rest of the world would still behave like naive children. If we accept the Theory of Evolution then we still have the question who created it all in the 1st place, and the answer to that is no doubt, GOD. The Bible was written by an elite who could write, the common man was still in the dark. Really, the people who don't believe in the Theory are still 150 years behind the times. As children we come out of the dark of the womb into the noise of the world. Without being suckled we would all die. In the bad old days, many many children died or did not make it past infancy. In China there is a celebration when a child reached its 100days. As we grown we sit up, we look about and we smile. For six months we are nothing more than eating and pucking and poohing animals. With Love and Care and Affection we grown and we stand up and we start to eat solids. Love and Faith start while we are at the nipple. We learn to talk and then we learn to read, We go to school and we read books. We also go to church and listen to the Bible being read. Or we go to the Mosque and hear the Koran, or we go to the Sinagogue and hear Scripture. We are nurtured spirtually and literally. As we grow we learn more things from books and from study at school. We discover things via the National Geographic TV or by the BBC, but  all the time we are growing. AS we learn we discover things that shock us.  Was it only back in the 60s that we had segregation and people called dark skinned neighbours Niggers. Did people really call homosexuals Faggots and Queers. Were people who demonstrated against Vietnam Communists. The stain of 3 assassinations in the 1960s lingers on. So the question is how far have we grown, how far have we travelled? If we never change then we are either a rock or we are dead. If we are literalists, and  we think that even word in Genesis is the Gospel Truth, then it means we have kept the minds of 5000year old people. Perhaps Man never walked on the Moon, perhaps it was Faked on a beach in Fort Lauderdale or wherever, perhaps the Moon IS made of Cheese. The Interior journey is always the longest and the hardest, I'm still on that path and will be till I die, I'm the Catholic who spent every lunch hour for 3 years hiding in the Protestant Cathedral, why? because as mountain climbers say "because it was there" and not because I'm "holy" but because I'm in need of prayer. I have managed to come up with some really good poetry due to my time spent before the cross.  As for Evolution, I read a history book when I was 10 it was called "The Outline Of History" by H.G. Wells, it mentioned The Theory Of Evolution, don't be affraid of a 150year old theory. For if we evolved doesn't it prove just how Childish we, and by we I mean Mankind is. WE  needed such a long time to evolve because WE ARE SO STUPID. LOVE should turn swords into ploughs BUT how are we all doing? WE still bickering worse than children, we are still calling are neighbours Niggers and Faggots. IT is Time for all of this to end, look into Space at night and see the Glory of God's creation, the stars at night, these are God's watch, the night breeze of your face is HIS breath. What difference does it make if HE did it in 6days and rested on the 7th, or IF Darwin is right. But don't be affraid of a film and "ban" it. Time, Evolution, and our Wisdom is just a Joke compared to God's LOVE.

 

photo is where my mum was born, very very poor, but VERY STRONG FAITH

From Shanghai to Birmingham

My girls are home at last after 8 weeks in Shanghai, so I'm no longer Home Alone. I'm not like the kid in the film, I'm a grown up, or so I'm told. My 2 small daughters plus the wife were in Shanghai visiting the Mother-in-Law, or Ma as we all  call  her. My smallest shed a few tears as she missed me so much. My big daugher as I call the other one discovered the joys of IM, so she could  send me messages. We did use the camera as well, and the voice aspect too. One daughter spoke to me while the other sent cartoons and silly things via IM, I got my big daughter to practice "the quick brown fox jumped over the lazy blue dog" as an exercise. I can remember my brother doing that 30years ago or more when he taught himself typing and Pitman shorthand. 

My parents could never dream of such modern technology, text, voice, and full voice and camera. If you saw a postman once in a blue moon, now that was something special, though that was back in 1920s/30s Country Kerry. Now the generations have moved on, technology is king. My kids went to the zoo and saw not 1 but 3 pandas and one was a baby panda. Something big to boast about when they return to  primary school in a few days time. They also went to the new beach by Ma's house. There wasn't one there 10years ago when I first visited, so they decided to build one and charge people 30RMB each to use it.  It looked nice on the photos they emailed me, however as its that part of the world you do have to be careful, because there are small sharks around. A great experience for such small children, they have come home speaking even more Shanghai dialect. They moved around too and spent time at various houses belonging to uncles and aunties. The Film uncle, the USA uncle, the Army uncle, the Taxi uncle, I cannot pronounce the names so we have shorthand to explain who is who. I have a Chinese name, Panzi, it means FAT FAT BOY, because I'm so big compared to the Chinese side of the family. They also saw Google cousin, because she and her husband work for Google. They did go to the Irish  pub and send me a photo showing them enjoying themselves, I think that should be classed as torture, there I was Home Alone while they were in the Irish Pub in Shanghai, its near the US Embassy if ever you are over there.They came home via Frankfurt, and 2 bags got lost because of equipment failure, but luckily the bags appeared, along with my wife/kids' treasure, shoes, a bag of shoes. I got a silk duvet, and that is a great great treasure, and what was the final treasure brought all the way from Shanghai, a big wok.

p.s. The house is so noisy again after 8 weeks of silence!

What makes me smile

We all have different views on what is funny. Americans seem to like custard pie humour, where the joke is telegraphed.Pie face pie face, custard pie in face.Say like Laurel and Hardy. Over here in England its a bit different. I can remember Monty Python  starting on TV, I was in 1st or 2nd year of  Grammar school. We had to explain to our French teacher what was all this "woody" business, Monty who? was his reply. Different styles of humour work in different different places. As you all know a baby can hear while in the womb. So why does our youngest daughter  have such a good sense of humour. Was it because of us her parents,her West meets East in her blood. you know what we think, while my wife was visiting she was 7/8 months pregnant, so the unborn baby heard her Chinese grandad making jokes and making everybody laugh. So that at an early age she is a mimic and makes us laugh, michaelgracycasey she calls me, putting on a deep voice and reciting what my prayer is, let my comedy book be published and can we have a bigger house, please god. And pumping up her shoulders too. This makes us laugh and is a natural thing, a 5 year old cannot be taught this. My own dad used to say "your ear is very near me", which was an implied threat, so it told us to behave. Me and my sister remember this and laugh, a 40year old laugh, I have told my own kids this and the smallest says it back to me in her deep voice. So it will pass down the generations, a remembrance, a prayer almost.

I was a concierge in a 4star deluxe hotel for 3years, this job gave me plenty of time to watch and learn from people. It also gave me a chance to practice my stand up while dealing with people. In the main I could make most people smile. It is a different art compared to writing or straight presenting, if you can do one it doesn't mean you can do the other. But if you smile at people they do tend to smile back, so if you start with a smile then you cannot go far wrong. 

 

Down my Street turn left to reach the world

They say that 100 years ago a man knew 2 blocks North, 2 blocks South, 2 blocks East and 2 blocks West. Or back in Ireland as far as the market and back to the farm. No doubt the same in England. World War One changed everything, their innocence was taken away from them, no virgin on a wedding night. But rape as the guns fired over no mans land. Men came home with tales of woe, tales of Paris and drinking by the Seine. Tales of Mud and Death, they never spoke of because it was too much of a torment.

The small world of the village was swept away. Buses came along and linked village to town, the railway too. A small world was changed into a bigger world. Radio was invented, the wireless as it was called. The world could reach into every nook and cranny of the isolated village.Was it the work of the Devil, this radio. Newspapers too, not to mention the fact that more people could read. Isolation did not exist any more. Then came the Cinema, the Flicks as it was called because the films flickered. Everybody's world was changed, everybody had a bigger and bigger world view. It was like a walled garden that had its walls removed. No longer a cosy world, but the winds of change, the winds of communication. The walls came tumbling down, the walls came tumbling down. You would need to be a hermit, or a monk hidden away on top of a mountain on an island that was lost at sea, then and only then could you have a sheltered existance. TV came along, black and white then colour. Then cable and satelite and then HD. Not to mention computers and Internet, perhaps living on the dark side of the moon is the only place to be, IF you want solitude. For my street is the world, and all its news.

The Invisible Diet

I'm big, my boss calls me "the big man". Some may say "fat", I'll stick with big. I am 3stones heavier than I look which I suppose is good. 3 stones is18 to 20 kilos, that in itself is the weight of a growing child, or one suitcase ready for international travel.                               My fat is  not wobbly fat, so I don't look like a jelly, its tight fitting fat. Makes me sound so glamourous, you can see my photo on this site so you can be the judge. Just big, or big boned as some fat people say. Me, I'm just big, so let's leave it at that, you don't want me to cry do you. I did have a compliment from my Chinese masseusse, she told my wife that all my skin was tight, so there you have it from a Phd a Chinese doctor.

Now what if I could share with you knowledge which will make you all lose 1/2 a stone, that's 7lbs is you are an American or 6 tubs of margarine if you are metric.

So how do you lose weight? You just don't try, and then as if by magic you lose weight. A Muslim friend at work SR, explained Ramadan to me. I said for Lent I'd just give up chocolate or something. Very easy compared to Muslim fasting. That was when I was a kid, now old age and so on meant...

So I agreed to give up Chocomilk from the company drinks machine. The drinks were free and we did work in a very hot print room. So I gave up my favourite drink for Lent. I still carried on drinking, but only the squash, not the nice and carolie laden Chocomilk. After a few days I did not miss my favourite drink, and the weight just fell off. Though another friend was quick to mention that M&S had just closed its sandwich shop near the office, so I was having smaller and not as nice snadwiches. That he  thought may be the real reason why my trousers were looser, whatever the reason, once my friend had come back from holiday with a new bride, he saw  the difference. Mainly with my thinner face.

So what is the moral of the story? If I can lose 1/2 a stone then so can anybody else, I did not look at any magazines or starve myself as girls do. It was the lazy man's diet and it worked. So here I am still Big but happier looking more and more like George Clooney.Look at my photo and judge for yourself, more photos can be googled.

 

Is serious news treated as a spectator sport, what do you think of Fox news style

Food For Thought
Think AS You Watch TV (c)

By Michael Casey   

As we sit in our armchairs watching the news , do we care what is going on over there , in some place hot , too hot to think about , or too cold to bear , ice and snow everywhere . Are we just waiting for the sports report , are we waiting to see was the battle hard or a walkover , did our favourite player score a home run , or 10 touchdowns , were the crowd , the audience behind him , did we win 100dollars from the bet we had on the side . In the interviews after the war was won , were we just watching to see the design on the teams shirt , is that a new logo , is that the same logo spruced up . Or is it a new logo entirely , does it make any difference in how the team played , or just another million dollars in the owners pocket , paid by us the audience , the fans , just so we can all look so identical . The reporters are screaming loudly , half excited and half in fear , they want to watch , they want to cover their eyes , but they are there so they must report . Are they in some arid desert , or in some cold cold place , pain and fear and hope etched on their face , are they in some war zone , or at the stadium , if all we heard were just their words , could we tell the difference , do we care , so long as we can switch it all off with our remote control .

Just a little food for thought , you can read my Betting On Disaster