Sunday, 18 October 2020

Lazy day as Tinnitus kept me in bed late, and no sadly is a noise, not a lover, so here's something else

 

Reposted Translations Galore just click to download your language

Well 300 and Not OUT seems to be a hit with you all, 2200 downloads in days

it would be better if you all went to Amazon and bought a copy but it’s more likely that

Trump name drops me on tv than that happens. Anyway thank you all and spread the word but not the virus, mask up everybody, not unless you are French kissing your girlfriend.

ALL in ONE place Translations Galore

Posted bymichaelgcaseyPosted inUncategorizedEditALL in ONE place Translations Galore

ALL in ONE place Translations Galore

spring

OUT이 아닌 300Downloadkorean-translation-still-alive-2015DownloadKOREAN Quick StoriesDownloadkorean-translation-still-alive-2015Downloadbbu-in-koreanDownloadall-for-koreaDownloadoutec9db4-ec9584eb8b8c-300-1Download

Arabic Altogether NowALL for KoreaKOREAN Quick StoriesWydanie polskie Still Alive 2015Wydanie polskie Still Alive 2015 – Copywin Wiersze dla wszystkichVietnamese Translation The Butcher The Baker and The UndertakerTURKISH tRANSLATION OF bbuThe Polish TranslationsThe Polish Translationsspanish-bbuSpanish BBUportuguese-bbu2019abcportuguese-bbu2019abcportuguese-bbu2019PORTUGUESE BBU2019polish Guardian AngelPolish Edition of Still Alive 2015Michael Casey The Polish Translationschinese translation BBUchina-bbu-converted-1China BBU-convertedChina BBUbengali-translation-of-bbuBengali Translation of BBUbbu-russian-translation-microsoft-wordbbu-italian (2)bbu-in-arabicbbu-germanBBU UrduBBU Russian Translation microsoft wordBBU ITALIANBBU IndonesianBBU in KOREANBBU in Indian HindiBBU in HebrewBBU in HebrewBBU in ArabicBBU in Indian HindipersianBBUPORTUGUESE BBU2019В поисках индийской принцессыWydanie polskie Still Alive 2015win Wiersze dla wszystkichThe Polish TranslationsThe Polish Translationspolish Guardian AngelPolish Edition of Still Alive 2015Michael Casey The Polish Translations페이지 1 Quick Stories KOREAN아직도 살아있는 2015ページ1 Quick Stories in Japaneseインドのプリンセスを検索するにはインドのプリンセスを検索するには – CopyЭТО МОЙ ЛИФТ ADСтраница 1shoplife spanishJapanese elevator AdvertBBU GermanBBU French50 Spanish Examples50 Spanish Examplesbbumar2008-en-zh-cn-1BBUMar2008.en.zh-CN (1)BBU in HebrewBBU in Arabic300 وBBU Russian Translation microsoft wordBBU in KOREANBBU GermanBBU French50 Spanish ExamplesKOREAN TRANSLATION Still Alive 2015The Polish TranslationsSpanish BBU아직도 살아있는 2015아직도 살아있는 2015아직도 살아있는 2015   

It is nice to see every day where you all are as you read my stories

It is over 80 places worldwide

I’ve covered all the major language groups and you can all buy my Original English

on Amazon https://www.amazon.co.uk/Michael-Casey/e/B00571G0YC/ref=dp_byline_cont_ebooks_1

I only read emails in ENGLISH with a decent subject line and I never click links

Junk emails just get deleted unread

Now curl up in bed and read my stories

14OCT2019b

Saturday, 17 October 2020

family photo

 family photo

my surviving sister gave me a photo that my recently deceased sister used to have.

It was of all the Casey family on my eldest brother's wedding day

Nearly 30 years ago

my own daughters said I had not changed

Nine people including the bride

now 3 are dead

I'm not going to share the photo

you can look at your own on the wall, or on your PC

I also received some rose cuttings

so tomorrow, my body permitting

I'll plant the cuttings, and we'll see if they grow

that's all for today


my own 2 daughters a few years ago, maybe 15

Friday, 16 October 2020

Forward Planning

 Forward Planning (c)

By Michael Casey

I don't plan these stories, maybe 10% I do, so it's more like fishing from my mind. If you are disappointed, then all I'll say is I can only Write what I Write, and do it my way, you can always do it your way. I do hope it sounds like Radio, no boring words on a page. And  yes I did really spend 20 years listening constantly to quality speech radio, that was before I picked up a pen. And yes I have total confidence in my writing, because I learnt the hard way. And yes it's even harder still to find a backer, who has confidence in my words. Me, I'm, well you can answer that better than me.

Writing feeds my spirit and it is all I can do, as my body is worn out, though if I met that speed typist Kpop girl I'd have 4 more children and form a Kpop band, or a martial arts school. As I sit on the sofa playing with the kids as I dictate more books, until the grim reaper finally gets me. I cannot complain, I've had nearly 6 years extra time, and statistically I may get 5 more years, as 11 years is the average extra time after a quadruple heart bypass. So I do tell my daughters to enjoy me while I'm here, though death won't have me without a fight, and lots of Movelat pain killer gel on my clicking arthritic left shoulder.


But you know all this already if you have been paying attention, and not just sending me rubbish from all over the world, with due respect.  Now to the theme, Forward Planning. Tonight one daughter has travelled to see the Dentist, so in the future I may get free brush and go, after he qualifies in 5 years time. Meanwhile daughter number 2 is thinking about University already. She has only just started her A Levels, but you have to think about where to go for you Degree. So she is already thinking about a Long Shot, but it's far closer and one of my brothers went there, otherwise she'd have to go far far away, to the University of Shrek maybe, or even over the border where men  are in skirts.


So I'm telling her how in 1974 my brother invented the Gap Year, by being a Coal Miner, and she is the Coal Miner's niece. How here grandfather was a blacksmith back in Kerry, and her Irish grandmother was born "in a stable" well almost, see photo attached, though it has since been demolished when my cousin's son took over the land. How her uncles came from the inner city and touched the spires of learning. How her mum is from Shanghai, thus making her bilingual. As for me, I was as strong as an ox but now just smell like one. Though they have a cat called Totoro too, as a reward for me having a bypass, it would have been a dog if I died, as I promised before my totally unplanned quadruple heart bypass.

She can also tell any interview panel how dad has written so much, and keeps on going. So can they please give her a chance to study Anthropology and maybe me, her dad is the greatest ape she'll ever study. So that's the back story, though less than 20 places to study there, where  her uncle fell in the river passing by, and ran half naked through the streets carrying his clothes, it was the 1970s, era of the streaker.


So that's the Hope for today, we've had a look on the internet, and it would be great, and it would be fun to do that there. Though both daughters would be away for a year, and just me and Totoro home alone. She could even do it where the Dentist is studying, so she would finish at the same time as he qualified as a dentist. She promises not to steal away the big sister's boyfriend, should she end up studying there.


So the Moon is a balloon, as David Niven used to say, it's a great read by the way, what will happen I'll find out in a year or so, if she gets an offer. But then she has to get the grades, not unless the back story of her life helps, inverse snobbery. My brother had 4 straight As by the way, but being a coal miner swung it, maybe. So there you go, a Hope, a Prayer, another piece of the Lego that forms my storytelling. 

But strange things do happen, and I can help somebody get through the eye of a needle, if only they take a chance on me. So Glam up Everybody, just as Pinsent Masons Law Firm in Birmingham used to do every Christmas Time, they also hired a coach to go help folks with their reading.

Nobody knows the Future, but we can all Reach for The Sky, just as Douglas Bader did, he should inspire everybody.













When the General French Kissed the Regimental Sergeant Major

 

When the General French Kissed the Regimental Sergeant Major ©

 

By

 

Michael Casey

 

Well I’ve had four kebabs and some coffee, and a good nagging from the wife so I’m about ready to tell the tale of:- When The General French Kissed the Regimental Sergeant Major.

If you have read the Malta story then you know where this piece of Lego joins it.

 

So if you are sitting comfortably and have finished your 20 mile stroll through the Brecon Beacons then I’ll begin. Esther had announced her intentions to her son, ok she pressed the red button and military satellites the world over screamed. Find my Mum. Her son was a zillionaire in the defence business after all. So she hitched a lift from the Maternity hospital in Birmingham to the airport, so that all the maternity crew could get to Malta and PDQ.

 

Now at the airport they just had to stop for Duty free, Mrs Murphy linked arm in arm at the duty free shop with Esther the mother of the zillonaire. They were chaperoned by a few Military, who had been told to abandon their war games and be an Uber for Esther. They were more than happy to oblige as the got opportunity to meet the legendary Tony from the Navy Seals. Tony being Esther’s shadow. But you know all that if you read the Malta story.

 

Now at the airport Barry and Steve were plane spotting with their grandad Colin. Colin was an old soldier, but he never talked much about it. Though he did wear his medals proudly when they went plane spotting at the airport. It meant they got special treatment from the airport security.

 

Now Barry wore glasses and a wheelchair, it was like a coat so he said he wore it. He could move about a bit with sticks but at the airport it as easier to stay in his chair. Steve was 2 years older and loved his brother to bits. Colin their grandad was really their dad, there was a car crash and mum and dad died and so they went to live with Colin. In England Colin is pronounced COL IN, not CO LIN as that General in USA calls himself. Colin was not posh, he was just a loving grandad.

As Esther and Mrs Murphy laughing like thieves left the duty free pushing a trolley load of stuff they accidentally hit Barry’s wheelchair. Esther was mortified, her Military guard though saluted, a real deep salute. They has seen the medals and they knew what they meant. Esther stopped to ask what they were all doing. Plane spotting came the reply. On impulse Esther said come with us to Malta.

 

So that was sorted. Colin did ask about passports but Esther and the Military just laughed. You were not holding your passport when you won those medals I bet, Colin blushed, he’d been rumbled. He never really spoke about his exploits. He was too busy with the lads. When they got on the plane Esther inquired what did the boys like at school, just by way of conversation. It turned out they loved maths, they had both already taken A level maths privately because the school would not let them do it.

 

Now Esther smiled, she had a feeling, a feeling only a good Jewish mother would know. My son loved Math, I encouraged him and the rest is History. Colin you go with the boys I want to talk your boys. So Colin rejoined the Military for the flight, and the Wedding Party were  making merry too. Esther leant in and asked Barry and Steve did they like puzzles. She borrowed two ipads from the flight crew, and logged in.

 

All you have to do is look into the screen so they can take facial recognition, and then do your best. You get a prize if you do well. What’s the prize asked Barry, could I buy grandad a new front door for our house house? Steve said the prize wouldn’t be that good, if he won the lottery grandad would rebuild his local British Legion, its near our house. Esther smiled, her heart was melting already.

 

So on the plane flew, the boys gave the quiz their full attention. Outside the fighter escort flew alongside, not knowing how valuable the contents of the plane was becoming. Finished shouted Barry, 20 seconds later Finished shouted Steve. Esther looked at her watch, 46 minutes 30 seconds. Did you press send when you finished Esther asked? Yes, yes. Good boys, now forget about the test you’ll be having a week at the Hilton in Malta.

 

Somewhere in USA Esther’s zillionaire’s assistant woke up screaming, screaming and screaming. Staff came running, this was the office and lab complex for the zillionaire satellite maker. It was like Iron Man’s but he built his 20 years previously before Robert Downy Jr imitated him. Art does imitate Life after all. It’s not all fairy tales, like Snow White, though snow white does exist, I cannot explain it to you now, just trust me.

 

Bruce was screaming because he had had a double hit, not powder up his nose but because the test taken on the plane to Malta had come though on his computer. And now Bruce had wet himself too. Esther’s son came running and saw the wet patch on his PJs. What’s wrong Bruce, I thought you were ok after the procedure, pointing to his pants. Boss, I’ve just had a double orgasm, 2 separate test with perfect scores, and they were quick real quick.

 

The zillionaire smiled, well send them a million each and tell them we’ll give them a house with pool in California, the future is waiting. And where are they, in Kansas? No, Boss they are on a plane to Malta with your mother. Well send 10million dollars to the Salvation army, sorry send 20 million dollars to the Salvation army, there are 2 of them after all. Mum would insist I give one of her charities something as a finders fee.

 

So that’s what happened, then the zillionaire rang his friend General Mike Tatters to share the news. So Mike remember your promise. The General did, Regimental Sergeant Major here. The RSM came running, with any explanation the general grabbed the RSM and proceeded to force his tongue down the RSMs throat. In the nanosecond before the RSM could rip the general to tatters, or at the very least to rip his tatters off, the General handed phone to the RSM, hello its me, we met once. The zillionaire explained. Thank you Sir, replied the RSM to the zillionaire. By now the other generals from a variety of Nato countries were wondering what was going on. So the the RSM got his revenge, he grabbed General Sir Mike Tatters and forced his tongue down his throat, I forgot to say he’d been Knighted by the Queen.

 

Sir Mike laughed as they separated, the RSM half smiled. Then seeing the other generals Sir Mike winked. So the RSM improvised and came back to squeeze the general’s arse by way of goodbye. So the general just stroked his cheek fondly. With that the RSM marched off. The French and Italy generals were a little peeved, the RSM did have a fine pair of shoulders after all.

General Sir Mike Tatters looked about him, he should explain but they could kiss his arse, he was a British officer and his lips were sealed. I hope you all know how to use a parachute there has been a change of plan. So they headed towards the planes.

 

The RSM just looked at his Men, and smiled, I’ve done may things while I’ve been in the British Army but that is the happiest moment of my life. Does that mean you’re going to start wear a dress, Sir. No, well only you buggers aren’t watching me he replied. They laughed. Then he explained. Britain had just produced not one but TWO coding geniuses, and thy would be staying in the UK.

 

As Barry and Steve had  asked for their hearts’ desire it would be granted. The Army, the British  Army would be dropping in to secure and rebuild their house, and as for the British Legion, that would be spruced up too. It was like an invasion planes flew low over the Legion and Colin’s house just up the road. Parachutes opened and men armed to the teeth came running. The RSM arrived boots first, I am your fairy godmother he began, if the old soldiers in the Legion had seen him kiss the general they would have believed him

 

Supplies came floating from the sky, they would rebuild the Legion, it was HQ, there would be a temporary Tent Legion covering the car park while the renovations took place. Then just as the old soldiers wondered what about the bar a Police Escorted beer wagon arrived, the zillionaire had shares in the company, so he asked and the Legion received. Then a truck with camouflaged toilets on the back. The RSM explained that Colin had friends in high places, and in fact most of them were jumping out of the planes above.

 

Further up the road Colin’s house was being secured, sadly there are always bastards, and his house had been broken into. However if you are a thief and you get caught breaking in by the Army what do you think would happen? Well the RSM doesn’t French kiss you, that is for sure.

 

So the house was secured, and the field behind was compulsory purchased, so Barry and Steve could have privacy, and maybe have a horse. The zillionaire looks after his workers, besides he knew they would never leave England. So the house was upgraded, with 2 gig wifi and a dedicated satellite parked overhead. Of course as England is colder than California so triple glazing was installed by the Finns, but with bullet proof glass, just for added safety.

 

Now ordinarily this would take a long time to do, but Money Talks and Cash Screams. 24 hour working under arch lights was needed, so in 3 weeks everything was done. The Legion never stopped serving beer while the renovations took place, the RSM himself served behind the bar in the tented pub. Barry and Steve and grandad Colin had to force themselves to stay at the 5 star Hilton in San Julian Malta for those 3 weeks.

 

When they returned General Sir Mike Tatters handed them the keys to their new home, though really retina recognition worked equally as well. Then they went down to the newly restored Legion. And why did this all happen asked an old solder. Because of Colin’s clever grandkids from Birmingham that’s why. The General looked around, can you keep a secret?

 

Then he explained how the zillionaire had made him promise if ever there was a British coding genius he’d have to French kiss the Regimental Sergeant Major. Never. Yes really. Never the whole pub roared. So as they were in great company the RSM put down the beer towel and came around the bar. The General showed how he had French kissed the RSM, and then the RSM showed how he had French kissed the General.

 

Stunned Silence, then the bar erupted in applause. The things you have to do for Queen and Country. But it was well worth it, a brand new British Legion bar, prices pegged at 1pound a pint for the next ten years. The RSM had insisted on that. As for Colin, he met a Korean widow aged 50, but looking 25, so she came and lived with them. In fact she used to be a British double agent in North Korea, but that’s another story. As for me I suggested soft toilet paper in the toilets and they agreed with me, as they threw me out for not being a member of the Legion.

 

    


Thursday, 15 October 2020

15th Oct 2020

15 oct 2020

well I had the flu jab last week, and this week I 've caught a cold, and am spitting phlegm into a tissue. I know you're glad I shared that.

Too many hours awake with Tinnitus gives you a cold, I'm blaming Tinnitus anyway so I'll flog him/her/it later. Getting up at 3 am to let the whoer(irish pronunciation) cat in as all the light sensors switch on all the lights in all the gardens. Then getting up again at 6am for toast and a hot drink, cos I've still not slept because of the hiss in my ears.

I've just pebble dashed the screen as I sneeze, the tiles on the roof lift and fall as my sneeze echoes along the hall

I may have to email folks in the night from my phone as I struggle to sleep

USA Election is still compulsive for me

Maybe I'll email Trump at the White House again

a lot of calling the kettle black at the moment

As corrupting as Politics is

I'd still back BIDEN

Though as my little daughter says only God truly knows

she got a 9 in Religion in exams just gone, the highest mark of all

her Muslim friends said she knew more than them about Islam

they even called her a little Muslim, not bad for a christian choir girl

anyway the kettle is boiling, and our boiler was serviced and I'm getting

a new and much bigger radiator in my bedroom

so hold on as Buble sings, for the kettle is singing so I'll go and have

another hot drink

Hold On


me at the door to the white house, ha ha  ha

Wednesday, 14 October 2020

The Little Flowers

 

The Little Flowers

The Little Flowers

By Michael Casey

This should be a story but Tinnitus won last night so you’ll get bullet points instead

I was wondering in the night about Trump’s Lies and Covid, and his “miracle”

I thought of poor poor people all over the world suffering

In North Korea, all that money spent on Fear, and Nuclear gear

So what of a beggar in North Korea, or in India, or in poorest Africa

Or in Brazil, and all such places

All they have is their faith or various faces, and grim and dirt all around them

They cannot do anything as the pandemic spreads and kills the spirit and the body

And on it goes, wave after wave

Trump lies and says it will end in a Miracle

He has 10 doctors yet in Court he tries to remove Medical Cover

So on it goes, the madness and the sickness

So in these poor abandoned places, a sigh of despair goes up

But this sigh is a prayer, a Little Flower Prayer

Bring joy and laughter back to us, let me sell flowers at the roadside again

And on the prayers go, in many languages and none.

As the planet dies, and the earth itself sighs, the prayers rise up

From space, our orb floats all alone

But we are not alone

Flowers are so very nice, says a timid little French voice

Flowers show love and hope

If only I could spread flowers everywhere

Little blue flowers in the dirt and desert and even in snow

Some little blue flowers even floating on the sea

The world could see the love that , our daddy has for all of us

Ca c’est magnifique says and even quieter mum’s voice

So flower appear in the heat of the desert and in the snow

Blue flowers appear everywhere from nowhere

They come from the heart of Heaven to the poor on the Earth

First to the poorest and to the meekest and spreading from bottom up

This is the miracle cure, the remedy to all our ills

The ice caps begin to freeze, and hurricanes stop and turn into a gentle breeze

Time is reversing the clock, Eden is being returned

People are shocked and some are in fear, some are not

It’s the end of the world some cry

Others say it’s a new beginning

Only those in the gutter really know

They look up at the stars, a new constellation is forming

In the sky is a warning

This is your last chance

Love one another like sister and brother

I have returned Eden to you

This is your hope

Tuesday, 13 October 2020

Hello Malta here's my Malta story, as well as photos

 















Malta is wonderful, we were there in April 2013, my last holiday, as weaknesses have crept up on me. Cisk Lager was great, the people are even greater.

So here's my Malta story, this will become part of Tears for a Butcher if ever I write it. Hello to Japan too they were reading me over on Wordpress. 40 translations maybe, you can go look for yourselves. and yes 40,000 downloads of The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker, and I still have not made a penny

But maybe one day, and then I can do what I promised.... go to Typepad to read it,and  also hear my Posh Birmingham accent.

Now to set up the story, the builders finally married, or at least one of them, but she was told she'd never have a baby, but God is Good.. Now read on


Nights in Malta ©

 

By Michael Casey

 

Before I start I should tell you I had a great week in Malta in 2013 and I long to return, even though it was there that my Arthur my Arthritis started to hit home. I was overjoyed that I could buy Deep Heat in Malta. Now its 4 years on and my unplanned quadruple heart bypass has overtaken me. I was told it was a triple but it was a quadruple I discovered 6 months later.

 

My cKd needs to be watched too, I’m telling you all this so that you can understand just how important it is to me that I can WRITE, its food for my Spirit even if you lot like it or not. So now I’m going to share part of a story that’ll become part of a chapter in Tears for a Butcher my full length sequel to The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker.

 

Now read on and apologies to Navy Seals everywhere, please don’t leave a horse’s head in my bed, a Subway one foot long sandwich would be better……

 

So it was all true, Tiny wasn’t mad or just battled out at all, he really was a seer, he saw it all the time, but when he wrote that picture in pencil and crayon the Admiral had to make a decision, so Tiny was grounded, his flippers taken away. So that’s when he became a bodyguard for that zillionaire’s old mum, lucky for there he was there he had to take care of her. He was more like a son to her, and that’s why she always wears a scarf, somebody got to her, before Tiny got to them. It covers the scar.

 

So what happened in Malta? Well Ester made a friend with this Irish woman in Birmingham, the one in England. You know how she likes to have real friends not people sucking up to her son, or trying to get a foot in the door. So when she heard about the triple birth, that was impossible, you’ll have to ask a gyno doctor to explain it. Anyhow Ester prayed like crazy, as only a Jew can pray. And her friend prayed like only an Irish Catholic can. But most of all Rita in Malta who was Mrs Murphy’s friend she prayed like only the Maltese can pray, and after what they put up with from those Nazi SOBs in the war they know how to pray.

 

So these triplets were born in Birmingham, in their Dudley Road hospital. And it was impossible, I can’t explain everything as we haven’t got the time. But it turns out that Rita’s son was the lead gyno  doctor. He had renounced his Faith went his dad had died and he with all his medical knowledge could not save him. But when the triplets were born they each had a Maltese cross birthmark on their shoulder. Mrs Murphy and Rita had met and done a deal, if one helped her friend have a child, just one pregnancy, then Mrs Murphy would pray that her son came back to the Faith.

 

So Almighty God killed two birds with one stone. He sure did, then Ester jumped out of the shadows, she’d flown non stop from Vegas just to be there. Everybody was so excited, Mrs Murphy was crying because she had not kept her side of the bargain. Then the doc revealed himself and it came out that he was Rita’s son. He was an old bachelor, but his nurse had loved him for years. You’re having me on, no for sure, Almighty God was settling all the scores in one day.

 

So they decided to go back to Malta immediately and marry before his old mother died. Only the French air traffic control were on strike, those SOBs are always on strike. So Ester through a bitchy fit, she got Tiny to press the red button on his phone. 14 satellites bleeped and the War Room went to condition amber. He son makes all the military satellites, its a bit like chipping your dog, but with Norad answering.

 

So to keep it short, a Nato war game was interrupted and 4 assault and recovery helicopters descended on down town Birmingham. Took the doc and his crew to Birmingham airport. They put the helicopters on the K734ASD plane and headed for Malta with F15 tomcats as escort. That Zillionaire really loves his mum, and the Joint Chiefs of staff love her too. Mrs Murphy did insist on visiting the duty free at the airport, it frightened a few people, Special Forces ambling through the duty free. But Mrs Mrs Murphy did insist on getting Rita and the soon to be newly weds a few presents. One of the forces chatted up the girl at the checkout and , well that’s another story.

 

My that’s a busy story. It ain’t finished, Ester’s son rang to hire the entire Hilton, only he got suspicious of their tone of voice. So he brought up the Hilton on 3 of his satellites. The Mafia were holding a meeting at the Hilton. When Tiny and the Special forces were informed they just smiled and jump straight out of the plane and cleared the mafia from the Hilton, so it wasn’t a waste of a day as far as Special Forces were concerned.

 

So that’s the end? No. Everything went well and the doc married his nurse in Malta, Rita and Mrs Murphy were overjoyed. Ester’s poker club in Vegas were annoyed because Ester had left them so suddenly. So she set her phone up so that her Vegas friends could play poker against some old Maltese men.

 

It was then that it happened. One of the Mafia had been hiding in a cupboard and sprung out. It was a room full of people and kids too. Tiny was going to do his stuff and save everybody but he was afraid that some kids would get hurt by stray bullets. So he’d have to smother the Mafia guy, Tint would probably die, but everybody would be safe.

 

Ester looked at the statue of the Virgin Mary in the corner of the ballroom, us 2 Jews alone in a room full of Gentiles. Let it be me that dies, I’m old, let it be me not Tiny, he’s like a son to me, he never got that girl he dreamed about. He drew her picture on paper, so pretty, then all red in the left hand side of her face. Please Mary, as one Jew to another, save all these Gentiles.

 

My granny used to ask me to sing for her, why don’t you sing for me.

 

Ester stood up as requested by the only other Jew in the room, so Ester sung something all the Gentiles would love. She sung the Ave Maria, Ester sung the Ave Maria. One by one they all got up and defiantly sung the Ave Maria. The Mafia guy was astounded, a wall of sound, Phil Spector producing Ave Maria.

 

Tiny could see this might give him an edge,and he edged forward ready to leap, ready to save everybody. At that moment Ester’s  prayer was answered, Tiny got to see his girl, for a waitress entered through the far door. She was beautiful beyond compare, and on the left side of her face was a port wine stain birthmark. Now the girl had been teased all her life because of her mark of shame. But she too had had a vision, or rather a voice in a dream. A man from the sea will marry you, the bravest man in the world is the only one good enough for you.

 

At that moment Tiny saw his girl and they both knew the prophecy had been revealed. Would it all end in death. Both begged the Virgin to save the other, let them live even if they died. At that same time  the girl, Rose was her name, she grabbed a saucer and threw it like a frisbee hitting the Mafia guy on his adam’s apple. As he choked Tiny flew with Saint Michael the Archangel himself flapping his wings behind him. The Mafia guy was disarmed and bundled away.

 

So that explains why every Navy Seal in the service is heading for Malta. Its true, we had to ask the Commander in Chief for special permission. He only agreed when we told him that Rose knew Tiny’s service number, she had dreamed it all those years ago.     

  *****

Portuguese Translations

Humour Writing by the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham England read in 167 countries so far https://www.amazon.co.uk/Micha...