Wednesday, 24 January 2018

Prof Beard and Me another rediscovered piece

DECEMBER 3RD, 2012 14:57
Prof Beard and Me

By michaelgcasey

I heard a bit of Prof. Beard on the radio and today in between wincing with pain I read her piece on the BBC website, of I forgot to say she was talking about teaching at Uni and all the surveys teachers have to hand out. We are all a market research driven society, it even has it on vans “am I driving well”, so you cannot avoid it. I did spend 3 years at a 4star hotel so I know all about customer service, if you get it wrong 10 people know about it, and if you get if right only 4 know about it. So 99.99% of the time you must get it right.
As for teaching, you have to please the Head at the school level or you don’t get that raise, or your 1year contract is not carried over, everybody is just a hired hand nowadays not just in teaching, we are also the worthless society, judging by all the 1 year contracts. Little wonder moral is so low. But we soldier on because we love our subject and we want to share it with students. But are they listening? That’s another question. At Uni at least they have chosen to be there so they should be more attentive.
As for Mary Beard and Homer, Homer Simpson is known and perhaps he IS the modern Shakespeare, her Homer the Greek guy, and not the one down the road in the Kebab shop. When she talks I listen and I learn, I enjoy her tv documentaries, and I don’t mind if she doesn’t apply war paint, she is not on X facter after all, but I would vote for her because she is so illuminating. BBC2 and BBC4 have opened up doors in the mind for me and millions more.
How about Prof Beard on Strictly Come Dancing, you could have Prof Brian Cox on it too, perhaps doing the music, all your fav teachers having a go at the dancing, and Brucie could give a lecture on the significance of dance in early culture., starting with cave men and up to the present day. Humour does have a place in learning, in my blogs some of you may have spotted it. Or then again perhaps I should have a makeover myself and try my hand at the Xfactor, a new Pavorotti.





Shakespeare was (an old piece rediscovered)

Shakespeare was....

NOVEMBER 28TH, 2012 18:42 Shakespeare was ……….. By michaelgcasey I’ve been watching the Sky Arts prog on Shakspeare. It was interesting but left me feeling empty. My tutor once said I was Shakespeare’s agent when I wrote an essay 20 years plus ago, all I can remember is that I got 74%. There was a documentary about Will on BBC2 a few years ago and that make a compelling case for Will being from Stratford. It highlighted all of Will’s influences and perhaps he was a Catholic too, how all of life’s events made Will the man he was. How he learnt so much stuff, so he was able to write what he did write, Will was the man. In good Will hunting the cleaner can do maths problems that out fox the greatest brains, in the end though that Will finds out the most important thing of all LOVE. Scholars say that Will Shakespeare couldn’t know this and he couldn’t know that, and he couldn’t possibly be so mean, according to the Sky Arts program. In real life we all know some Son Of a Bitch, who seems so nice but in reality he’s a SOB, if only we knew about things but the person seemed so nice so genuine, but in reality… People have got away with murder and things even worse than murder, but we don’t have hindsight. Shakespeare is the same, he amazes us, he touches us. Steven King frightens us to death, doesn’t mean he should be on Death Row, he must be warped because of the way he writes. It is his job, it was Shakespeare’s job, writing is what people do, you don’t have to be a Saint to pray and you don’t have to be Satan to curse and do worse. And if only we didn’t mix the two up with current sad and tragic events in the news…. Shakespeare is fun and kids do him at school, Macbeth is being studied by our kids if they are old enough to be in the GCSE class today. Cliff Notes and BBC Bitesize are a great help. But back to the plot, I feel the older BBC documentary was more accurate, and I vote for that version of Will’s identity. If I can do my bit of writing, from my own background then why on earth cannot Will be the man who wrote his own stuff. Clever people are trying to hang their own coat on Will’s frame, but sadly the cloakroom tickets have fallen off and the wrong garments are being given to the wrong man. Michael p.s. I still maintain that Prince Hal was a bit of a lad and would abandon Falstaff once Kingship beckoned. http://butcherbakerundertaker.blogspot.co.uk/



https://www.amazon.com/Michael-Casey/e/B00571G0YC 











Free Stuff

Free Stuff ©
By
Michael Casey

Well my daughter is home from school so I’ve told her I’ll be with her in an hour after I’ve written this. She’s off out anyway to see some Mentor about some Church stuff. I like the word stuff its a great coverall word, like duvet or throw are. Though I’ve discovered some Americans don’t understand all my language, though Polish and Ukrainians do, even though English is their 2nd language. But I digress.

Today I want talk about Free Stuff, such as all the ads we are subjected to all over the place. Buy one and get one free, or two for the price of one, though that is also a line from a song on The Visitor’s album by Abba, my favourite album of theirs. Go listen its on Spotify.

You also get free stuff offered by emails, after Microsoft haven’t read your emails but know enough about you to offer adverts perfect for you, because they have scanned your emails, which is reading them, or are they following my sites? Or am I just a fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham?

I mention pain in my writing as its part of my life, and so recently I’ve been offered CBD or some other letter combination. I had to Google it before I realised it was Cannabis, legal cannabis. If you knew how much I detest drugs, I take loads but they are legal ones called medicine that my doctors insist I take. So being offered drugs even so called legal ones just makes me want to puke.

I can get on a bus and have to smell the stuff as some routes have more cannabis users on them than others. And passive smoking of drugs gives me headaches when I’ve bumped into the haze accidentally. Skunk the strong version is terrible, and sadly the users think its cool. I’ve know about all this stuff for 50 years from when I was a child, every generation think they are the first generation. Imagination is the only thing worth having and you don’t need any substances to help you find your Muse.

So I declined the “you have been chosen michaelgcasey” invitation. I also got another junk email for pain relief from USA. The Opioid crisis in USA hasn’t reached us yet in England, so I’ll stay on the NHS medicines, and grin and bear and scream and swear, sounds like a dance routine, Google LuLu’s Shout song too.

I sidetracked myself as usual, what was I really going to talk about? Yes, Free Stuff. As far as food goes I only buy what I or the girls eat, and crisps and chocolate is top of the list, because they are girls, and its a change from all the Chinese food from Shanghai mum. So any offers or free stuff is always good. I never buy something I don’t need. I just had to buy three shovels and a pick, because the pick was free. You are not Snow White buying presents for the Dwarfs.

By the way did I tell you when my sister was in Normandy as part of her year abroad she went to the cinema and saw Snow and The Seven Dwarfs in French, she sat next to a family. On the Monday the PE teacher teased her and asked had she got a boyfriend yet. So my sister stood up in the Staff Room, which in France is more like a cafe, and Sung in French Some Day My Prince Will Come.

So let that be a lesson to anybody who tries to put down a Casey. You can also be tempted by holiday offers, which many people are thinking about now in January as Winter bites. Have two weeks for the price of one, which is very good, but will you have enough spending money to last? Far better to have a one week holiday somewhere really nice, and if you can bring 2 weeks spending money for that one week of holiday, now that’s a better offer.

Free is a strange word, so is Casey, who said that, I though I’d got rid of Boris and Lech and Gregorgi didn’t they win a free holiday to Davos, no they are just shoveling snow for a week, and no it’s not a metaphor. As I was saying Free does not mean free, well not to a sales person. It’s like a prostitute showing an ankle, you have to pay to see the rest, and as for anything else, you really do have to pay.

So Free this or Free that does not lead to the other. You can have it free then you have to pay, you thought it was free but you have to pay. Because it’s a trick. Offers for Computer Software can be like that, free for 60days, pay nothing at the checkout, but they have your bank details now.Other free offers ARE free you get it for a month then if you like it you sign up. Beware of free software offers because there are loads of sharks that will poison your computer, and if its a business computer you will be screaming and screaming because you fell for the free offer.
Just to remind you all you should do backups every day to 3 media, or even twice a day. If you lose your customer details what are you going to do? So even if it is just 3 usb sticks. That is better than zero security. You can get Free Email too, so if you have 3 accounts with 3 different email providers then you can email files to yourself and back files up to the One Drive or G Drive or whatever it is. Free yourself from worry. Computer Security gives you Peace of Mind, one place I worked nearly went bust, due to lack of security, almost. Remember I started in computers 40 years ago.

I’ve wandered all over the place today, but that’s the thing with Free Stuff it distracts you from what you really want and what you really were going to do. So be disciplined, have a list, at least in your head, and then if there is free stuff find it and use it. Even if its coupons for toilet paper, and yes I speak from experience, some of you in America may call me just a bum, but at least I have plenty of paper for my own bum.








Tuesday, 23 January 2018

This is my About me



My wordpress  site m is below:-

https://michaelgcaseyfrombirminghamengland.wordpress.com

Contact michaelgcasey@hotmail.com

 BUT WITH A GOOD SUBJECT LINE


I do not open links nor attachments nor empty messages.

 https://www.amazon.com/MichaelCasey/e/B00571G0YC 


2015 was worst year in my life, I was 2 hours from Death after my Unplanned Quadruple Heart Bypass. My pulse was 230 beats a minute, they had to zap me to slow down my heart etc.It was supposed to be a Triple but I later learnt it was 4 grafts. So I'm lucky to be alive. i also have the joys of Arthur my arthritis. If ever I make loads of money I'd start a Pain Relief Centre. And no I don't mean a house of ill repute, as I cannot play the piano like Les Dawson did. I hope to write 3,000,000 words before I die. I have reached 1,270,000 already. I have now produced 15 books, go to Amazon to BUY them. My daughter wants me to write 27 books, just like the 27 Dresses in the film, but writing books. It means she loves me and wants me to keep going. Yes many millions have more pain, I just bitch about it more eloquently.

 My Writer's profile on Amazon says it all. 


https://www.amazon.com/MichaelCasey/e/B00571G0YC 

https://www.amazon.co.uk/MichaelCasey/e/B00571G0YC
 as does my Blogger Profile https://www.blogger.com/profile/08360300604946924721

 Google "michaelgcasey" and look for the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham England look for the silly photos, not the posed photos. 


I am not the Monk of the same name either. 

This is my main site https://butcherbakerundertaker.blogspot.co.uk 

This is my backup site https://michaelgcasey.blogspot.co.uk

 And this is my other backup site 


https://michaelcaseyfrombirminghamengland.blogspot.co.uk 

https://www.blogger.com/profile/08360300604946924721 

And if you want to hear me then 

http://www.michaelgcasey.typepad.com 

https://soundcloud.com/michaelgcasey 

If that doesn't make you sick then nothing will. 
So please buy some books now. I'd like to buy my daughter a car for when she goes to University. I'd also like to move house but I don't think I'll ever sell enough books to do that. Not unless that black cat perched outside our house brings a lottery win. All our own cat brought was flies.


 The Flies Around Our Lives © By Michael Casey 


Well its 3pm and the wife is out relaxing or rather having a business lunch then she’ll meet some Shanghai friends in downtown Birmingham. A busy day for her. But life is all about balance, this morning as the snow fell she was busy washing the fleas out of our cat. Obviously it was my fault because I did not get a new flea collar for the cat last time around. Even though now she has a red rubber flea collar with a bell on. The collar with the “best bitch”medal has long since gone. So there I found the wife washing the cat in the bath, just when I wanted a pee, and I always want a pee. So I told the cat to close her eyes while I had my pee, the cat just laughed, she had seen it all before, she is a cat that goes out at night after all. Hence the fleas. So the cat was washed with my citrus shampoo, as the citrus is supposed to keep the fleas away. Perhaps a new medallion with a rude message for the fleas might work. So I went back to bed for another hour as I’d been up much earlier, thanks to Arthur my arthritis, I think its all the cold weather bringing it on. Later on I said hello to the cat who just gave me a lion look, she’d claw my, well she’d just claw my, if I didn’t shut up. Cats don’t like being washed. As for the wife she put on her posh clothes and went away for fancy food. The snow still tumbling down, she grabbed some money from my purse, so she could buy cat flea spray from the Vet on the way to her fancy food. Yes I have a purse for coins and a wallet for notes, my dad had a purse too, which was in his pocket as he worked in the steel works. So I follow his manly tradition. Now its later and its like steam bath in the house as we have put all the washing on the radiators to dry, yes people still do that in 2018. One daughter has come downstairs in her bright pink pyjamas that grannie sent from Shanghai, she is now feeding herself on chicken dippers by Birds Eye, a staple for the girls in our house. Its a change from all the Chinese food. The other has decided to walk in the snow to the church to do the Music Tidy, I told her not to go, but I was ignored, so I told her not to moan when she got a cold. Common Sense has to be learnt the hard way. I was lucky I watched all our lodgers 50 years ago, and learnt many things. The cat had been hiding behind the settee next to the radiator but she has since slipped up the stairs to hide in one of the bedrooms. Everything in its place, and a place for everything. If only I could put my Arthritis in the bin, that would be the perfect place for it. My mug is the computer desk to my left, to the left as the right side has the computer tower and to avoid potential mishaps the left is the safe side. The printer by my feet is covered in protective paper just in case of those coffee spills, and thank God for that. So everything is in its place. When I’ve finished talking to you this piece will find its place on my sites https://butcherbakerundertaker.blogspot.co.uk/ and https://michaelgcaseyfrombirminghamengland.wordpress.com/ and it’ll be backed up and secured too. So my words have their place in cyberspace and on my PC and security. I’m tidy and methodical, and you need to be, especially in a busy household or things disappear, such as girls’ leggings. My wife and my smallest daughter are the same size and my eldest daughter is a bigger size, but with leggings one size fits all. So yesterday we had the Pantomime of where are my leggings. After much name calling we found them. They had been left on the outside washing line when we’d been in a hurry to bring the washing in. And no I had not been wearing them, women’s silk stockings yes and high heels I will wear, in my private moments, you have all seen De Niro in Stardust. There is a time and a place for everything. I may pop out to the shops if the snow melts, depending on how my Arthur feels. It is like having an unwanted invisible friend having arthritis. Either way its quiet with the wife out of the house, she’ll no doubt reappear telling us all what great food she had twice. I’ll say any doggy bag? And she’ll reply I’m too fat already, being 3 times her weight literally means that’s her permanent put-down. I say think of my life insurance, so she smiles before changing back into her farmer clothes. Pyjamas with a National Geographic fleece on top, makeup is removed too so she then looks 17. So that’s a look at life with the Shanghai/Birmingham Caseys, Tororo our cat will reappear later looking for love and snacks. We have to put her collar back on, without the bell she could be an assassin or a Ninja cat. But most of all there are no fleas on her. And even if there were my wife would never let me eat them, as I’m too fat already.





 that's your lot now please go buy some books, I dare you, I double dare you.... Michael Casey the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham England , there can only be one, just like in Highlander...

Just got back from the scan

Just got back from the scan

will consult with GP in a week with the results.

I'm covered in gel and sticky, it's like the Pregnant woman scan

I'm fat but can confirm not pregnant.

I did not eat for 8 hours prior to the scan

So grabbed some hot chips from a polite mature woman

Then found some money by a store

So it was not a wasted day.

Have  had two bowls of cereals since I've got home.

So that's 3 meals.

Still hungry, promised my daughter to get prawn toast tonight to celebrate end of fast.

I'm still getting a random arrow/cursor moving all over my screen, cannot get rid of it.

If its Barron Trump and his friends hanging out in his back bedroom at the White House can they

just find something better to do. Like finding a cure for my right ear tinnitus, now that would be

useful. Or getting schools to hand out PDFs via email of all school lesson material.

I need chocolate now, I only had 2 toasts in 16 or 18 hours. If you  count from my last meal before

bedtime. I know you all think I'm such a lard a))). You are so unkind and I thought Ukraine was

starting to be my biggest fan. I'll cry me a river, or is that a Michael Bolton song?

More Nonsense Later.

Ans yes I use rubbish photos always, I am not a Kardasian.




Monday, 22 January 2018

Scan Tomorrow so here's something to keep you going

Scan Tomorrow so here's something to keep you going.

I am having a scan on my Pelvis/Kidneys tomorrow so here's something to keep you all going till I return covered in gel or whatever they put on you. And no they are not looking for my soul, but something near my A))))hole.

i cannot eat all day till the scan either, then I must have a full bladder before they put a cold sensor all over me. So I just hope I don't end up covered in my own pee. Must remember to bring some spare pants. The joys of CkD.

Where do the tears go when they are shed ©
By
Michael Casey
Where do the tears go when they are shed
While I lie here crying on my bed
Do the tears drip drip away and seep though
The floorboards and head for the sea.
Do my tears join an ocean that rises and falls
Do the tears yell and scream but only sea farers
Hear them, do whales moan as they crash through them
Only whales know of my distress as my tears groan
In deep deep oceans in the unknown dark deep seas.
Do my tears head north to the North Pole and Santa
Does Santa Ho Ho Ho so much because he is trying to drown
out
The cries and sobs and tears held back for so many years.
Do tears form ice shelves and become icebergs, silent and
majestic
Like giant cathedrals of ice. Is this the way to silent
the voice of tears.
Frozen in Time for 100s of years, the fears of today and
yesterday are merged
As one, gagged for eternity in an ice cathedral.
Will everything be forgot, deep freezed, quick frozen
like garden peas.
Do my tears evaporate and head for the sky, joining the
clouds as they pass by.
Are my tears blown this way and that, are they taken far
away over the ocean.
As planes pass through the clouds that are my tears, can
the passengers hear
Can the passengers hear my tears, all my hopes and fears,
or are my tears
Drowned out by the inflight movie, 007 killing my
prayers to heaven.
Do my tears wash away my pain, my guilt, are they like
mothers’ milk?
For tears touch us all, they are like a morning mist that
shrouds us.
For tears are the dark dark night of the soul, a cold
coat that covers us.
In the morning we remember we fell asleep crying, but
what of now?
Now we’ve looked at our dead mum’s photo and think of
what she would have said.
We smile as we remember, her fight, her love, her spirit,
her smile.
But never tears, she shed no tears for us, she shed no
tears for us.
Tears will come, tears will come again, but they are just
water, we are stronger
Than mere water, we have a boat and that boat is Love.

**** I had this poem in my head so tonight I tried to a
nail it down
IMGP0422

The Perils of Job Hunting



The Perils of Job Hunting ©

By Michael Casey

So Christmas is over and you start to think how much you hate your boss, sure you enjoyed snogging him at the Christmas party, but really you hate the SOB. So you are down the gym trying to avoid looking at  your bouncing boobs while you are on the treadmill. Or wishing your lunchbox was bigger, depending on your sex, or gender if I have to be PC. As you sweat you think I deserve better than this so you look at the job ads as you jog.

The salaries are so large, as large as your bouncing boobs or your fat arse, or as large as  you wish your lunchbox was, sometime you wish you were that Dave runner guy. But now you just wish you had another job. It’s the money that motivates.  40K for doing that, you do double that for half that. Only the job requires you to move to another city. To any city in any place you care to mention, depending on where you are as you read this, maybe Singapore or  Boston USA, or Kiev  or Paris or Egypt, where ever you are.

But for that money you’d go to the moon and you wouldn’t have to share with that stupid girl from your college days or with that dodgy bloke with the smelly feet. So you apply for the job, not realising that the Cayman Islands are in the Caribbean, and not a Channel Island near France. You don’t know the costs of anything. You have not done your research, so 40K may be twice what you ae on now, but over there  with living costs and so on, its half what you are on. So 40 does not equal  twice 20, in real terms 20 equals 10.

It’s a basic mistake that people make when they are in a hurry. You have to spend a minute checking your figures  before you apply. Living costs and Transport costs matter, and in London you have congestion charge too. Do you like going down the Tube? Some people do not, the Shanghai Metro is glittering and new as is other countries, Paris is Paris and  you may love it. Then some cities have major pollution, if you work by the sea do you think you would like the city smog?
You have to think about these things. Living space, working space, playing space, and I’m not talking about Mars bars either. You have to think before you leap or you’ll float off into outer space.

Read the job adverts clearly, google earth the address. Spacious open plan offices, with great views. A warm environment with a buzz. This really means there is a balcony that overlooks a carpark. The fire station is next door and there is a night club on the other side of the building. The building used to be a transport café just before the motorway, hence all the car parking, for trucks. 

It’s like when you look for houses, you MUST look at Google earth before you book any viewing, just in case there is a prison next door. Birmingham Prison used to be called Winson  Green Jail, so if it said Winson Green you knew you were near a jail. Which might be ok if you wanted to become a Prison Officer.

People Believe What they Want to Believe, this is even more so if they are running away from a job or people. The grass is always greener somewhere else. So you need to do a 360 degrees appraisal of the new job. And be honest can you really do the job? I know one person who thought he was the bees knees but had to resign within a week, as he was not up to the job. On paper the person was great, but in reality they were not up to the task.

If I was able to apply for jobs I’d have to be realistic. Could I carry heavy boxes of paper all day? NO. Could I run around a very hot print room all day? NO. Could I stand all day on marble for 12 hours and walk 5 miles every single day. NO. Those are just some of the jobs I did in the past. Now I’m lucky to be a Housewife or Hausfrau and look after the kids while my wife goes to work.  It gives me time to Write, but honestly I don’t have the Stamina for anything else, it’s not fun being weak compared to your former self. I could be a Gigolo but I’ve had no offers.

Getting back to you, can you handle all the work, the Job Spec says 10, but in fact 20 tasks are required. If you work in a hotel, expect to do everything, Roger counted up all the stuff I did and there were at least 10 different things. If you like to be busy and exhausted, then go work in a hotel, but if you want just to do one thing, be a machine minder. You have to have a job that suits your personality. For Me hotel work was the thing. Then years later Esol English teacher was perfect for me. It’s all about talking after all, and with a Writer’s mind it was fun and I enjoyed it. If you like Maths, and talking then be a Teacher because the Government in UK helps with your training and pays more for Maths skills. Obviously don’t be a Teacher if you hate kids. But it’s an idea for you.

So do a Reality check before you apply for those jobs. Will you miss your friends and your home comforts. Remember if you move to the big city you have to pay perhaps double for your accommodation, so your big wage soon disappears. Same goes for petrol costs and food costs. It soon mounts up, so you think 40 is great, double 20. In fact 40 can equal 20. So what’s the point ? 

Why do you want that job? If you are running away from that girl you got pregnant, maybe that’s a reason.  If you are ashamed you did a Bridget Jones and all you want to do is run away, then perhaps that’s another reason. The real reason for doing anything is Love. Because you Love the Job, not the Money. I was lucky in some of my jobs because the people are great, and the pay way good. In other jobs the pay was dire, but I had fun, and it was all I could get anyway. 

Remember to keep those job skills up to date, especially nowadays. I confess I am a dinosaur on the IT front, I was a computer operator 40 years ago this year, on DEC PDP 1170s you can google a picture. If I had a computer brain I could have become a programmer like Chris or an Engineer like Pad or Stu. I don’t know where the other 10 guys ended up. I do know that I am happy enough when my pains stay away because I am doing what I enjoy, I am the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham, the one in England. Even if I am a bad housewife and not a Gigolo.
  












Portuguese Translations

Humour Writing by the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham England read in 167 countries so far https://www.amazon.co.uk/Micha...