Just reading the Press . TRUMP wants to be a dictator

 I write fiction and satire

But Trump is totally Insane

Dictator gone mad and he hasn't even got the keys to white house yet

The IQ of a teenager

How much does not anything cost

Who will do the jobs when they deport everybody

Orwellian Future

His Talk will become reality THIS time

Using the Military

Removing Generals and everybody with real Experience

So that they can kiss the backside of a Bone Spurr General

USA is having a nervous breakdown

But it affects the entire world

A Tariff is paid by the IMPORTER

So you pay 160 instead of 100 in the shops

The exporter does not pay

You are allowing Trump to be a King

King Canute got his feet wet

Look in a History book

Or have you burnt those

Two years before mid terms

Before the brakes can be put on

Forget the Madness of King George

The Stupidity of Trump

Has Musk hypnotised him

All this Bitcoin nonsense too

It's just funny money, a total bubble

And Micky Mouse picks with ZERO experience

Trump driving the world over a cliff

But he claims to be the best at everything

He didn't even bury his first wife properly

Her grave is in the rough, unmarked and unloved

The Love of Money is behind all of this

Love People and use money as a tool

Instead of being a Total Fool

piece 5045. G20. Press Pool and everybody something from Tears for a Butcher if I ever write it

 stumbled over this

MY CHINESE Relatives and all the G20 crew might like it

the playboy is a Shanghai billionaire's son

who finds redemption in Old Forge and Singing Anvil

here in Birmingham and the Black Country

now read on

Its just a snippet, but Translation links for other stuff

The Priest and The Playboy

01/07/2019 ~ michaelgcasey ~ Edit"The Priest and The Playboy"

The Priest and The Playboy ©

By

Michael Casey

 

Mrs Murphy’s eyes were wild she just felt so much guilt, and all because she wanted the toilet, now Big Sid might die, it was all her fault, it had to be she was a Catholic after all. So again she went outside the church and asked could Father Dan come home, her eyes were beseeching. Just as a mother would beg for a stay of execution for her only son, now she wanted her Father Dan.

 

The Chinese Billionaire quietly asked a wounded Smiling Paul where might this Father Dan be. He’s in China somewhere up a mountainside somewhere, they are building a huge damn nearby, and he is building a new church higher up, away from where the damn will flood the land. The Chinese Billionaire looked at his host the English aristocrat, if he is in China then I will bring him home to her. Then he took his phone out and rang his friend in the Chinese ministry of development. Two minutes later all was arranged. The priest would be coming home. Ordinarily it might take days to get the priest to Shanghai Pudon airport but there was no time to waste. A way would be found.

 

Thanking his friend in China the Billionaire asked were his grandchildren still thinking of coming England to improve their English, he actually switched to English so the aristocrat could understand. I have a friend who could possibly teach them to ride and could arrange secure accommodation. The aristocrat smiled, so it was all arranged. With that the aristocrat reached for his phone, hello Zara how’s the big man, if you have any spare time would you be able to teach some friends to ride. So that was all arranged the Queen’s granddaughter would help with the riding lessons.

 

The aristocrat was still feeling angry regarding the shooting of Big Sid, the whole of England was. So he asked Spencer his manservant to fetch his Pearlys he’d have some target practice. As Spencer loaded the shotguns the aristocrat fired at targets another member of the staff flew into the air. Do you shoot asked the aristocrat? Unfortunately not with those kind of guns. As Spencer bent to pick up a dropped cartridge his own sidearm fell to the floor. The Billionaire picked it up, careful its loaded. The Billionaire smiled and disassembled it in under 30 seconds. Well it’s safe now, and as Spencer smiled in admiration the Billionaire reassembled it. Might I try as a target with this? And so he did. Yes he was just as skilled as the aristocrat. Spencer brought out more ammunition for the sidearm and the the aristocrat and the Billionaire has a good hour of stress relief. When you have 10,000 acres you won’t disturb your neighbours with all the banging.

 

NOW THIS WILL BECOME PART OF THE FINALE OF Tears for a Butcher

I’ll try and finish this section of the jigsaw in the next few days. I have it all written in my head, but I don’t think I have it on paper anywhere.

The Priest and the Playboy bond and kick ass bigtime, and The Playboy learns to respect his father again. He even finds his one true love in Birmingham, of course she is Chinese too. There will be lots of Kung Fu action and so forth, if ever the Tale gets to be filmed. Shanghai Film Corp do get in touch and I’ll dictate the story to you.

 

so come back later and I’ll post it as FINISHED The Priest and The Playboy and also hello to Japan and Korea for passing by again. Everybody is welcome. Maybe you could both use my stories to help teach English via Comedy in both your countries.

 

 

ACTUALLY I HAVE WRITTEN A BIT MORE SO COME BACK AFTER YOU READ THIS AND WHEN i’VE EXPANDED ON IT ALL ANOTHER DAY

 

Chapter Ten Tears for Butcher

Chapter Ten Tears for a Butcher ©

By

Michael Casey

Big Sid had ambled into the Post Office he wanted to change for his till, so naturally he had stopped to talk to Mrs Murphy who was telling the world that June beside her was expecting a 2nd child. Sid held baby Sheila in his arms like a Saint Christopher and told her she’d soon have a playmate. It was while he was holding the infant that 3 armed men in motorbike helmets broke into the Post Office. But for that he would have immediately charged them like a raging bull, but he was holding the infant so he had to control himself.

The alarm rang, and Sgt Mulholland had coincidentally pulled up outside, so a siege ensued. Now I won’t give you all the details of the siege here, but Big Sid immediately made sure that his bulk was in between the 2 Mrs Murphys and the infant. Over his dead body would any harm come to them. And on the siege endured. It turned out the robbers were at the wrong Post Office. They should have been at the Hope Avenue Post Office, the very big one the other side of town. That’s what happens when you don’t know how to use a Sat Nav.

Big Sid’s friend the Professor from Birmingham Medical school had been leading a conference of surgeons, and Jake Powers an American surgeon had wanted to say Hi. He’d heard how the Professor had used Big Sid in a lecture and BQ and wanted to meet Big Sid in person. He was going to emulate the idea back home in Dallas, imitation is the sincerest form of flatter. Jake Powers was tall and lean and proudly wore his cowboy boots and hat, he was the son of a rancher after all.

So the Professor and the American happened to be at Big Sid’s butcher’s before Jake Powers would take old Michael’s taxi to the airport. There is no such thing as coincidence only the Will of God, and maybe Big Sid had friends in the Highest of places. The Professor waited and was told that Big Sid had gone to to the Post Office. Then the siege began. The Professor looked at his good friend, you don’t want to miss your flight do you? Jake Powers looked him in the eye, just in case, just in case I think I’ll stay. Besides I did not have time for a drink in the Trader. Jake Powers had never had alcohol in his life, so the Professor smiled.

The Professor whispered into his phone, the nearest hospital is Dudley Rd hospital, the one opposite Saint Patrick’s church. Can Blue team assemble this is not a drill, he looked up at Jake Powers, just in case. Just in case repeated Jake Powers. I better let my friends know I’ll not be on the plane home. So Jake Powers phoned his friends who had by now gathered around a tv at the Birmingham airport. Collectively they were Dallas’s best trauma and gunshot team. We understand they said, and where is the standby hospital? Dudley Rd, opposite Saint Patrick’s church.

In a nanosecond the team decided to heck with the flight we might be needed. However they were a full hour away from the hospital. So Dean Marvin a surgeon from Dallas stepped outside and whispered into the ear of a bored Policeman. And with that they boarded their coach and the coach driver was told by PC Jones to stay right up his arse. So with a Police escort a coach full of the world’s greatest surgeons were on their way to join Blue team. It was the first week on the job for Ken the coach driver, with a new coach firm who were desperate for work if only they could get some publicity.

Well God works in mysterious ways, Sky was covering the seige now, and their helicopter saw the coach right up PC Jones’ arse as instructed. The A team was on it’s was, let’s pray they are not needed.

Singing Anvil Coaches were all over Sky news, a free advert as Ken  drove like a bat out of hell on his way to the hospital.

Everybody was calm at the siege. The robbers expected millions of pounds, but would get next to nothing at this Hope Post Office. Big Sid stayed positioned with his bulk protecting the women as the 3 bandits argued over whose fault it was. Then Fate or Ill Luck beckoned, Mrs Murphy was dying for the toilet, so she demanded they let them all out and then surrender to the Police and 10 years in jail. Shut Up you old bitch was their reply. Big Sid said they should not speak like that. Mrs Murphy fired back what are going to do, shoot the baby?

Yes, we’ll shoot the baby the trio of bandits replied. That was a red flag to Big Sid, nothing would ever ever ever hurt a child. So the raging bull was released. He was shot once but threw one straight out the Post Office window, then he charged the second and was shot a second time as he threw the 2nd bandit out the shop window. Big Sid looked back at the women. Are you all safe, YES they screamed in fear. Then Big Sid though by now bleeding heavily charged a 3rd time and got shot a 3rd time, but still managed to throw the 3rd bandit out. But that was not enough for Big Sid he staggered out the shattered front window and Body Slammed the pile of bandits. Is everybody safe he asked?

Jake Powers knew he had to save Big Sid’s life, he was the bravest man in the world, he had seen it with his own eyes. The Professor and Jake leapt into action, Big Sid was hauled into a waiting ambulance. Sgt Mullholland took the wheel, both ambulance men were needed to help the Professor and Jake Powers. Sgt Mullholland floored it, the junctions had already been blocked off as a precaution. Sgt Mulholland flew and I mean flew through Old Forge and Singing Anvil, down the Bearwood Rd, down Cape Hill and down the Dudley Road to the hospital.

And what of the three bandits, they were being savaged by hairy Amjit, the long haired alsacian. Nobody in the Police bothered to stop the dog, that’s if they dared. Finally hairy Amjit pissed on each one in turn. Then he picked up their guns one by one and left them at the feet of Roger the Traffic Warden who shook hairy Amjit’s extended paw.

Mrs Muphy knew what she had to do now, it was all her fault anyway, she should not have been so cheeky. But now her Rosary Beads were out in plain view. Michael get me to Saint Pats quick. With that old Michael the taxi driver floored it, he drove even faster that the Police, he had Saint Michael the Arch Angel behind him. At Saint Patricks  Mrs Murphy walked to the very front of the church and kneeing against the altar rail she began another Rosary.

Mrs Murphy’s heart was breaking, Big Sid could die and it was all her fault. But she had her Rosary and Big Sid had the world’s greatest gun shot team there all tending to his wounds. So she started in 5th gear, no time to waste, she rattled through the Rosary. Outside a media scrum had begun. A slow news day had now become a very big news day. And on she prayed. Her prayers were not enough, she needed more Rosaries, then in her pain she had an idea.

She went outside the church next to the cross and asked Sky news could she say something. Sky news put her on live, this was by now a big big story. Can I ask for prayers for Big Sid? YES. Screamed the Sky reporter, and echoed the BBC reporters and ITN and more. So switching to French she asked for Rosaries, then in Spanish and in Italian. In 10 Languages she asked for Rosaries and said the Our Father, Hail Mary and Glory Be in each of those languages. Whenever she was on Pilgrimage she learnt the Rosary in a new language. The reporters were amazed, a little of lady from Old Forge and Singing Anvil could speak all those languages. All she could say was the Rosary, but that was enough. It was the Virgin Mary’s Nuclear Weapon after all.

Now the shooting of a butcher by 3 armed men, who were disarmed by him became a big big story. Hairy Amjit savaging them and collecting the guns and leaving them at the foot of the traffic warden was shown worldwide. Now Mrs Murphy beseeching for players also went worldwide. The daughters of the rosary leapt into action worldwide. A cry from the womb could never be ignored. 24hour prayers were soon in action, thanks to time zones and Mrs Murphy’s language skills. She even knew Hindi.

Now while all this was unfolding a British Aristocrat and a Shanghai Billionaire were gambling, and who else but Smiling Paul was  leading the entertainment. When Big Sid broke all over the news Smiling Paul screamed as if stabbed. The Aristocrat was livid too, his ancestors had provided the beef for King Henry’s Sirloin. As for the Shanghai Billionaire, when he heard Mrs Murphy beg for prayers not only in Mandarin but in Shanghai dialect he could not be moved. He was also a secret catholic.

Then as Smiling Paul howled like a wounded dog his wife comforted him. And then, and then the Shanghai Billionaire realised, Smiling Paul was The Lucky One, the man who was prepared to give everything to save the restaurant business of his Chinese friends. The silly looking one with the most beautiful of Chinese wives. Now at that moment the Shanghai billionaire swore Big Sid would be avenged, as did the English aristocrat. To upset one billionaire is a bad idea, but to upset two. And how could he help? Father Dan was  in deepest China and Mrs Murphy’s broken heart asked for his return. So the Shanghai billionaire returned her priest, and asked his playboy son with his penthouse at the top of Pearl Tower to come to Old Forge and Singing Anvil too. And because of this coincidence his son would return to his father too. As I’ve said before there is no such thing as coincidences only the work of God. And that work would begin with Fr.Dan  hearing the confession of the 3 bandits inside Winson Green Jail, I forgot to say Fr.Dan is Old School, but I won’t talk of bruises in a prison cell, he is a martial arts expert too, but what else do you expect of a Jesuit….

 

persianBBUPORTUGUESE BBU2019China BBU-convertedChina BBU-convertedВ поисках индийской принцессыWydanie polskie Still Alive 2015win Wiersze dla wszystkichThe Polish TranslationsThe Polish Translationspolish Guardian AngelPolish Edition of Still Alive 2015Michael Casey The Polish Translations페이지 1 Quick Stories KOREAN아직도 살아있는 2015ページ1 Quick Stories in Japaneseインドのプリンセスを検索するにはインドのプリンセスを検索するには – CopyЭТО МОЙ ЛИФТ ADСтраница 1shoplife spanishJapanese elevator AdvertBBU GermanBBU French50 Spanish Examples50 Spanish Examplesbbumar2008-en-zh-cn-1BBUMar2008.en.zh-CN (1)BBU in HebrewBBU in Arabic300 وmy new bedBBU Russian Translation microsoft wordBBU in KOREANBBU GermanBBU French50 Spanish ExamplesKOREAN TRANSLATION Still Alive 2015The Polish TranslationsSpanish BBU아직도 살아있는 2015아직도 살아있는 2015아직도 살아있는 2015

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Eye drops

 eye drops

as my eyes have gone pink as well as the green phlegm 

and carrier bags of tissues

you get the picture

wouldn't want to blanket bath me

i'm full of sickness right now

the noise in my head is like Buddy Rich on LSD

but at least it's not country as he hated that

i need to slap on the pain killer on my left shoulder

the smell from that is sickening on it own

SO 

if you don't get a new story from me don't moan

you've all been looking at the DIY English lessons

and none of you even email to say thanks

i get to see the totals so I know 167 countries have read me

and multitudes read me for free

Thanks to Singapore especially , I must be your chewing gum

And Koreans too, who seem to like me too

Finally pray for Peace

I don't want my daughters growing up in Putin's wicked world

There is a solution to the war in Ukraine

Turn around and go back to Moscow

You can do it in less than Trump's 24 hours

And Russians stop believing the lies on TV

Trust the Fridge not Putin

and yes the Immaculate Heart of Mary

Peace can come immediately

Put a new ballet on Russian TV

5043 Did you hear about the Undertaker who died of coughing

 Did you hear about the Undertaker who died of coughing

a very old joke

my life at the moment coughing my guts up

a bag full of phlegm at the bottom of my bed

i had both the flu jab and covid 19 jab on the same day

but I managed to pick up some other bug

then Tinnitus screaming so I get no sleep at all

nobody would want to be in my bed chamber

luckily I don't need a pot

the bathroom is right by my door

my eyes are weeping too

Dr Google says wash them out

or Breast Milk or urine can sort an infection out

so though some of you may wish to pee all over me

a full breasted wife of my own would be preferred 

to a Trumpian golden shower, which sums up everything

Trump is doing, destroying USA from within

the GOP seems to have nothing left against him

Micky Mouse and Pluto are in the cabinet

So In God we Trust is your best bet

as Trump does not  care about anything

BUT HIMSELF

Let's see if God has the last word

HE did have the first after all

IN the beginning was the Word.....

Happy 555 to my Indian Readers

Michael Casey

About the author

I've updated this today 13th April 2023

I'm Michael Casey from Birmingham England, the fat silver haired writer in shades.

Beware of Others with the EXACT SAME NAME, they are not me, and would not want to be me ...

I've done loads of writing, about 2,000,000 Words worth over 35 years now

But before I started I LISTENED to BBC Radio 4 for 20 years, from the age of 10 or younger

Frank Brown our lodger, went back to County Tyrone and he gifted us his Bush Radio.

He'd be nearly 100 now if he is still alive, so say a prayer for him

50 years in love with words, and I still look so dashing.

I have a picture in the attic, just like Dorian Gray

I've also had an interest in Politics for 50 years

with my dad heckling the tv and Politicians.

I almost immediately had a hit, a play called Shoplife was accepted but not finally

produced by a Theatre.

The Kenneth More Theatre, so thank them for sparing you all. This was back in 1989 yes, 30 years plus ago, the play was written in 1988. So since then I'm more than good enough, as a writer. Anything else.....

I also had other high praise, so I ignore all the nasty negative people who use too much alliteration.

I also ignore those who just cannot write.

Today's world has much print, but a page will not refuse ink, as my dad used to say.

I tend to write Comedy as I'd rather make you laugh than cry

I have written over 2000 short pieces of writing, yes 2000

If you include "chats" about 4200+ samples, not in a jar either

so if you count Everything maybe 3,000,000 words

the chats do NOT go into my books when I compile them.

My first book ,a full length comedy/drama is The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker

You can read translations of it here on this site https://michaelgcaseyfrombirminghamengland.wordpress.com/

Up to 22 different languages/translations have been read on the same day

via this site, here on Wordpress and my 3 Bloggers

so you have no excuse, find your own language

and read

The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker

This proves to me that the humour does travel

I have readers in over 162 countries now

From Nepal to American Samoa and all places North South East and West

Or its just a hit man on the run,

or whatever Unknown Region Means

It may also mean that only non English Speakers like my stuff

I did get 21,000 readers in 3 weeks for the Polish version of In Search of an Indian Princess.

which is basically the final 3 chapters of The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker

all by word of mouth. and 50,000 in Xmas week 2021

If you add up all the Translated downloads from my Wordpress + 13,000

when somebody stole the file.

I have had more copies than Boris Johnson's Churchill book distributed,

40,000 maybe but I got no money for it

I also had a low budget film producer take a look at it back in 2013

Book Publishers have said I've made the commissioning editor laugh

Radio People say they like my style

So close but no cigar is the story of my life, so all you power people, do something useful

HELP ME REACH FOR THE SKY from my position in the gutter looking at the stars

As for my life, I was a computer operator for a market research company into alcohol sales

21 years altogether, and I was born in the shadow of a Brewery

I also was a concierge and 10 other roles at Crowne Plaza NEC Birmingham for 3 years.

I even hid a copy of my comic novel "BBU" in the Law Library at Pinsent Masons, well just for a day..

and I was an Esol English teacher in an Islamic school, I knew I could teach.

I got Excellent, Excellent and Exemplary on the external assessment

beside which I've had a Shanghai connection for 20 years now, including 2 bilingual daughters

and being a hausfrau a long time too, I'm a great dad, as I've had lots of time with my daughters

I can always make somebody talk or laugh, I am an 19 stone George Clooney look alike

Laugh or Die so to speak

I believe my short stories could be used to help teach English, just package them up correctly

or App them into Michael Casey Story Jukebox

What else, I was brawn and brains, I used to be as strong as an Ox, now I just smell like one

We have a cat called Totoro, my daughters wanted a pet I said they could have a dog if I died , or a cat if I had a heart attack. A few weeks after that in Jan 2015 I had an Unplanned Quadruple Heart Bypass , it was supposed to be a triple but it ended up a Quadruple, 33% extra free so to speak. Now with an add on Hernia pushing through my bypass scar, it hurts when I laugh, so don't make me laugh

I also have arthritis and other hindrances that hobble my body and give me pain galore.

But my mind is free, though having read my stories you may wish I didn't bother

But I'll ignore you, and carry on regardless. I do get heckled by my own Tinnitus these past

4 years+, so I have music on all night long to drown it out.

Tinnitus is a curse, I wake up with so much noise in my head every morning

for 3 hours I'm terrified for hours till it calms down

It's no joke, drives you to the edge of insanity and beyond

Go Google if you don't believe me

I sleep with Miley, Taylor, Eric Clapton and Will Young,

maybe I should buy a bigger bed, or just get a better mattress.

April 2023 I now have a better mattress and duvet too

That's the end of the tidy version of my life,

if you want more come and buy me a Stella Artois and all will be revealed.

Though I've never been much of a drinker, too many alcoholic lodgers

puts you off alcohol

To finish here's the list of my 20 books, so far:-

1.The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker

2.Shoplife

3.Essays and Plays

4.Blogs 2011

5.300 and Not OUT

6.Shorts 2013

7.More Shorts 2014

8.Quick Stories

9.Still Alive 2015

10.Undiscovered Words 2016

11.Still Smiling 2017

12.Altogether Now

13.New Horizons

14.14 Up

15.15 Down

16.Sweet Sixteen

17. 17 Again

18. 18 New Views

19. The Final Cut of the 19th Hole

20. 2020 Words

21. Fresh Fields 70,400 words written so far

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Michael-Casey/e/B00571G0YC to buy ebooks

Tears for a Butcher will be the sequel to BBU, and it too will be 600 pages,

if ever I get around to writing it, however I really need

a speed typist to put it down, while I sit and dictate like Barbara Cartland,

and hopefully my speed typist would be impressed. From Typist to Muse...

We go on to have 4 children and form a Kpop band, and I'd be the manager

the kids would be called Mathew Mark Luke and John in whatever

is the Korean/Japanese or whatever language the typist speaks

its better to dream than just die

ok, that's your lot,

p.s. Don't forget I have readers all over the world, everywhere there is Electricity

or maybe only Foreigners like me,

The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker are being read, on the same day,

along with my Quick Stories collection of short stories and other books

I've placed online in multiple languages

so Media groups do get in touch

2000 plus copies of Quick Stories in Korean have been downloaded

and 1000s of Arabic translations too

other languages are there too, just so you all suffer equally

Maybe only foreigners find me funny, or I should just look in that mirror

email michaelgcasey@hotmail.com

or send a message via Wordpress REAL PEOPLE NOT FRAUDS

Spammers beware

I don't want any prizes, and I don't believe you have millions to share with me

or you are dying. I never click links, too many years using computers, 44, so I

know just how much damage RUBBISH can do

Leave me in Peace to write when Tinnitus isn't killing me

not unless you are a speed typist who wants to type for free

while I repose on the sofa behind you

Then just maybe Tears for a Butcher will be written

a 600 page sequel to The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker

Michael Casey

aka the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham England

p.s. hello to Martina Casey my Kerry Cousin too, I just got the christmas card you are always first, and yes The Casey Clan were the kindest to me always and forever, not for getting my mothers side too

the house is gone now but the love remains