Words Past Present and Future ©
By Michael Casey
Its Chinese New Year 2017, no doubt my wife will tell me which
animal it is this year when she comes home later. I think I’m a dog even though
my Chinese nick name is Panzi or Pig, but at least I’ve never been called a
Dog. Words mean something and they have weight and value, though some may say a
Politicians words are as worthless as a Used Car Salesman or an Estate Agent or
Double Glazing salesman.
So you can see Words mean so many different things, to you, to
me and to the World. I’ve only ended up talking about words today as Theresa
May our PM is traveling the world drumming up trade, the irony is that Napoleon
dismissed England as just a Nation of Shopkeepers, and look what happened to
him. A Nation of Shopkeepers was the original title of my 1st book a
comic novel, in the end it became The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker.
Why are words so important, because of the actions that follow
them. He’s all talk and no trousers is one expression, I remember hearing it in
a 1960s film perhaps, I know what it means but I don’t know what it means. Was
it originally a girl commenting on a man’s lack of sexual performance or was it
just that the man just talked but then did nothing. It’s about lack of action,
whatever sort, you can all Google it for yourselves.
Red Lines are another favourite of Politicians, but if a Red
Line is crossed and then there is no action afterwards then the Politician is
seen as weak and feeble, no matter who they are, you can pick your own
Politician wherever you are in the world reading this.
Cursing and Coarse words are very strong and effective, we all
use them and if you are telling me you have never used such language then I’d
say you are a Posh Panda, which is the worse thing a Shanghai zookeeper can
say, believe me I was at the zoo17 years ago this very week. A curse can save a
life, being called a Posh Panda in Mandarin saved me from being dumped on by a giraffe,
and that would have been load of pooh from a great height. You all have a
cartoon in your mind now of my head and a giraffe’s rear end, see cartoons made
from words.
Your Word is your Bond, though not shaken nor stirred, if you
say you are going to do something then you should do it. In different Cultures
words mean different things, other cultures like to haggle and bargain that’s
why Westerners seem dull and boring because they just pay the price. The Haggle
is the most important part of the day for the trader in foreign lands. Words
are his toys, he goes home and tells his wife the top 10 haggles of the day,
English people tend to be the most boring as far as he is concerned.
That was until he met my sister on one of her travels. This
looks like a load of crap she’ll begin with, though she’s posh as you expect
her to be, so she says R U B B I S H spelling it out, just so the trader can
hear. He’s reading Time magazine, he did a Masters at the LSE before coming
home to run his dad’s stall wherever. Then my sister will walk away and look at
another stall, tut tutting, the rubbish here is unbelievable.
She’s set her
heart on a scarf of pure silk, not viscose, she knows the difference at 100
metres, she is an international traveller after all. So she goes up and down
the stalls lambasting the quality of their stock, I wouldn’t even donate this stuff
to a jumble sale.
It’s a dull day, it has been raining and trade has been very bad,
so my sister is like a shark circling, she’ll have a bargain or bite their arm
off. After stopping for street snacks she deigns to walk past the 1st
stall, her target, her prey. How much do you want for this dirty rag, the scarf
not your Time magazine, who is that blonde on the cover, never mind, how much
for the rag.
The stall holder says 10 she laughs and walks away, ok 9 he
offers. My sister laughs even more, she does teach Drama after all, so her
wicked witch laugh is legendary. The laugh unsettles the entire market, the
stall holders are afraid and one even rings the priest. Resistance is futile
you will be assimilated blares from a tv above the market, the stall holder gives my sister a
scarf , she pays 5. In his haste and fear he give her a scarf worth 20, and the
stall holder mumbles goodbye my sister turns back, half the other stall holders
duck in fear. I always have a GOOD BUY.
So from the legal, decent and honest example of my sister’s
use of words, or did I just make it up, anyway from the example you can see how
we can use words to negotiate to get what we want. Now we have Theresa May negotiating
for UK and some may ask why does she wear red and all the fancy fashion.
Well for two reasons, she is a woman, and when she wears red
that it to hide the blood of her victims, sorry I should be more diplomatic,
her negotiating partners, her opposite numbers. And why all the heavy circular jewellery,
its remind men that she will crush their their, just as Sir Francis Drake did
after he finished his bowls.
Need I say more, or has my lack of words been more
than enough. Less is more and as her admirers may say, she may only be the
vicar’s daughter, but you haven’t got a prayer, as resistance is futile, or is
that science fiction?
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