I want to be on the radio©
By Michael Casey
Michael was security guard at AllUWant chain store, he’d been there a number of
years, he enjoyed meeting people and helping out. Occasionally he’d have to run
when a thief came a visiting, he was not very good at running as he was big, or
fat if you want the truth. But he was good at improvising, he always had a plastic carrier with him. So
if a thief came he soon knocked them to the ground, he was a good shot, so he
threw the plastic carrier at them. A thief cannot run if his legs are inside a
carrier.
So Michael was held in high regard by the owner,
the Old Forge and Singing Anvil store had the lowest theft rates in the whole
of England. So everybody was happy, but Michael harboured a dream, he wanted to
be a radio star. Well not a star, he just wanted a quiet corner to read out his
stories, he’d been writing a long time, but nobody knew, apart from the girl at
the stationary store where he bought his paper and ink. He’d shown her his stuff
and she was his number one fan, if only he’d ask her out, she fancied him
something rotten.
www.michaelgcasey.typepad.com
was his site and he’d recorded his stories there.
Doris would lay on her bed and listen to Michael
reading his stories, he had 500 of them, she just wished he was lying on the
bed next to her. Doris wanted Michael but she was too shy to say. She promised
herself that one day she pluck up the courage to tell him
Michael had had a busy day and he’d caught 3
thieves, a family in fact. Sgt. Mulholland had taken them away with a smile.
He’d have them playing chess against him while they were in the cells. Michael
had managed to bang his head while he captured the thieves, a little blood was
running down into his eyes.
Doris had been visiting AllUWant when she saw the bulk of Michael,
her heart skipped a beat, she noticed the blood trickling down into his eyes.
Her maternal instincts kicked in, she ran towards him and grabbed him by the
arm.
“Michael, you are wounded, let me take a look at
that,” she said as she looked into his eyes. She took out her hanky and spat in
it, then like a mother she wiped the blood away.
“This looks bad, you need to apply pressure and
then put a bandage on,” she chided him. Then taking his hand in hers she led
him to the first aid point. Her heart beat more, his heart beat more. Had it
taken a beating about the head, for the drumbeat of love to be heard. They made their way to the office.
“Here sit on the desk and I’ll apply pressure she
said,” as she pushed him back on the desk. That push would change both their
lives. For accidentally she had switched the tannoy on, the whole of AllUWant
would hear everything.
“Let me look at that wound, just apply pressure
then I’ll put a bandage on,” she cooed.
“You are really gentle, you’ll make a great mum
someday,” replied Michael.
She pushed too much on the wound.
“Oow, “ that hurts screamed Michael, his screams
echoing around AllUWant.
“Sorry, but I’d need a boyfriend before I could be
a mum,” replied Doris as she looked deep into his eyes.
“I assumed you had one already, I mean you’re a
big girl,” observed Michael.
“You saying I’m Fat?” asked Doris indignantly.
“ No, you’re perfect, I mean, I think you’re
perfect,” replied Michael starting to blush.
“ I think you’re perfect too, when I listen to
your stories on the computer while I lay on my bed at night, I think it would
be so much better if you were on the bed besides me. The real thing, and not
just a voice on the computer,” replied Doris
Cheers echoed through AllUWant, people had stopped
to listen and enjoy an unfolding love story.
“Tell us one of your stories,” pleaded Doris. She
had decided, he was going to be hers, she would be a mum, and he would be the dad.
“Which one?” asked Michael his heart beat going
faster. He looked at her and she looked
at him, they twinkled even, twinkling said it all. It was like a comet across
the night sky.
Michael told a tale or three, people in AllUWant
listened, he really was a good storyteller, he actually wrote stories and could
tell them so well. The tannoy echoed. Michael and Doris were in love, the urge
was upon them.
“Kiss me,” whispered Doris.
“Kiss you where?” whispered Michael.
The whole store looked up to the first aid office,
they could see Michael and Doris kissing. They could hear the heavy breathing
too, this was true love.
Roger had been on car park patrol, he had a
megaphone in his hand. He watched and listened from the store floor, just by
the toilet rolls.
“Michael if you and Doris are going to make love,
please turn off the tannoy first,” he laughed through the megaphone.
Doris slowly switched off the tannoy, she had
Michael where she wanted him.
The next day Michael was summoned to the office,
it must be the sack nothing else. Doris was by his side, she’d tell them it was
all her fault, it was the urge and so on. Mr Blair was there, things didn’t
look good.
“I heard about yesterday, and I only have one
thing to say,” began Mr Blair.
“It’s all my fault Mr Blair, I just realised how
much I love Michael I’ve been listening
to his stories for months, all 500+ of them.
Every night hearing his voice as I lay naked on my bed. It’s too much, a
girl can only take so much, nature is nature,” explained Doris.
Michael realised he may have lost his job, but he
had got something better in exchange, he had got Doris, or rather she had him.
“Michael, get a room, in fact just get married,
I’m giving you 2 weeks off, I have this cottage in the Virgin Islands, your
honeymoon will be there, but don’t make too much noise, Richard Branson is a
neighbour,” ordered Mr Blair.
“That’s so generous,” gushed Doris.
“When you come back Michael, there will be
changes. I want you to record all 500+ of your stories, we had feedback from
the shoppers, they all want to buy copies of your stories, and AllUWant always
gives shoppers AllTHEYWant,” declared Mr
Blair.
So Michael and Doris went to the Virgin Islands
for their honeymoon, and as they lay naked on their marriage bed, Michael told Doris
stories, lots of stories 500 times over.
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