Writing for Playboy

Writing for Playboy ©

By Michael Casey

I never thought of writing for Playboy until today, it was in the News that Playboy wouldn’t be having Nudes any more. I think it’ll be more like our page 3 or the Sun which we have over here in England. There was even a piece in the Daily Telegraph extolling the virtues of the Nude in art and the Nude and the Love of the female form in Playboy. There weren’t any glossy pictures to go with the article.

I could offer myself, my body, as the last naked form in Playboy, but I think they’ll like to finish with a female, despite me being so great looking in drag. Besides naked no matter how good my drag I’d be rumbled, even if I crossed my legs and shaved my entire body. All the pain killers I’ve been taking post op have given me a very slight pair of man boobs, so now I’m a 46AAAAAA.

What if I offered to write for Playboy, how could I interest them and their readers in my Words. Well I can write humorous stuff, but would it match the under the bedcovers photography of the girls, whatever their state of undress or part undress. Would the readers tear themselves or their eyes away from Mandy the 38CCC model to read my Words. I did write a piece called What Makes a Man Attractive to a Women, such pieces of mine could they prize the eyes away from the Girls to the Words.

I never really think of a target audience when I write, I hope I write for all, I hope what springs from my mine to the page is interesting and funny.  Would Playboy give this Birmingham England boy a chance to amuse, to amuse in all the foreign editions too. Would my words be a hit in Japan or Russia, or would I have to appear naked with a pocket dictionary  to be my protection against rejection, rejection I said are you  all deaf.

There was a book about Noel Coward the British actor, wit and playwright called A Talent to Amuse written by Sheridan Morley, that’s the son of the actor, anyway it was so wonderfully written that the words flew off the page. Would Playboy have featured his writing, well he is otherwise engaged, but my diary is free, and I’m available and Hugh doesn’t need to use the casting couch with me, though I would do almost anything for an XXXL dressing gown of his.

So if you want this Birmingham boy to write for you, just get in touch, I have already sent an email this morning, it’s in your system somewhere. Just give me a couple of days to iron out the wrinkles in my body, then I’m all your, just be careful with that staple.